So, this is how we live now.

London has become pre-apocalyptic and is utterly unfamiliar and, between mass unemployment, housing uncertainty, concerns for the vulnerable and an extreme shortage of pasta, no one’s situation has been improved by a pandemic. Even our positively ancient Queen has been made to isolate. At least neither you nor I are locked in with Prince Phillip for weeks on end; this might be the ending of their 72 year marriage!

Social distancing is strange and difficult. Skype conversations take the place of social gatherings as everything closes their doors and hugs are out of the question. Last night was the 'Last Night of the Pubs' and, well, this is England, and it went just about exactly as you'd expect. We somehow avoided the city burning down, but chaos reigned.

The weather improves and the sun is out, but at midday Hampstead Heath is empty. I’ve taken to getting up early and taking big, long walks just to be doing something, anything, and not crawling up the walls of my flat, imploding from boredom and really scaring the cats. I pass maybe five people over fifteen miles. Maybe that’s because of my choice of destination. You see, where better for social distancing than somewhere where you’re at least 6 feet away from the nearest person and you can be pretty damn sure that they’ve impervious to disease?

I’m talking cemeteries. And London has some monsters. Highgate cemetery is the OG of final resting real estate; a maze of Victorian eccentricity in acres and acres of woodland where coveted spots have been given to an eclectic bunch of noteworthy individuals from Marx and Faraday to George Eliot and Jeremy Beadle…but Highgate Cemetery is now shut and the volunteers sent home. So I took these cards as the sun started rising to Abney Park instead.

Abney Park is another one of the, er, ‘Magnificent Seven’ Cemeteries and is 31 acres of woodland graveyard around a central chapel. Cramming in over 200,000 bodies since it opened in 1820, it was one of the first to be non denominational (you know, initially as long as it was still some sort of Christianity). So whilst it is only in retrospect I realise this may have been a badly timed and dark choice, I thought it a beautiful and peaceful place to show off this week’s cards.

u/ThatDude_DE honoured me with a card from his North Korean offer, granting me something incredibly unique and utterly fascinating. I’m not sure what Kim Jong-un would make of it sitting here , but maybe he’d appreciate the amount of interest that the offer brought.

This quirky card of a local bar was sent by u/jasaaanlim from Singapore and he tells me that the depicted chairs are actually an art installation that lights up in the evening. He reflects that sometimes we don’t fully appreciate the beauty or significance of small things; I think right now that’s a lesson that many are learning the hard way.

Sent on Leap Day, a vintage card of flowers from an unnamed user in Hungary with beautiful bugle stamps. She wishes us a happy spring; so do I! Who knows how we will adapt? Will we sit on our rooftops with jugs of Pimms and toast each other from our retrospective buildings? Will indoor barbecues be MaGuyvered from window boxes and teabags? One things for certain; I think we can all abandon any aim of getting a beach body. This inactivity is going to have us having to appreciate a little chub.

u/MyBFFRose sent a wonderful card depticting one of Aesop’s fables. In my case, I received the lessert known story of the Frogs and the Sun. In this fable, the frogs lament the upcoming wedding of the sun because they anticipate that the union will bring about the birth of a second sun and the combined heat will fry them. It’s a allegory for power and powerlessness and how every action might affect others. Another strangely poignant card, though now I’m starting to suspect that I’m reading into everything!

This handsomely antlered chap from u/witchdusk bares my future. Right, well, you know how I just said I was reading too much into everything? Seeing how this was sent before the full proportions of the pandemic were realised in the West, and as a result I’m suddenly out a job and potentially homeless soon it’s kinda exactly on the money! Or…not on the money as it may be. Whatever slang term you like, it’s uncomfortably accurate and the lass has a gift.

This gorgeous homemade creation with my word of choice elegantly and beautifully written on it is from u/shepanda and is decorated with my favourite colours. It’s a little stunner of a card and, even though she opted for the American spelling (:P), it will have a very proud place on my wall of loveliness.

A little tweety bird gives me thanks from u/ksbuni who was a bit under the weather when I sent a card, and included tea from Singapore so now my Englishgirl tea cupboard has extra fancy additions. Hope she’s back on form and fighting fit, ready to face the supervirus.

u/tigerlady13, I mean Aunt Bertha, bestowed a recipe for indulgent sounding cheesecake bars on me that will be attempted as soon as it is possible to obtain all ingredients. It might take a while with the state of the stockpilers! When I do, you will be the first to be shown the results. I really appreciate being sent special family recipes, it makes me feel special myself, like I'm included in your family. Not prominently, more like the distant cousin that hovers on the outside of the group with bad fashion sense that no one really likes to speak about, but present nonetheless.

Last but not least, I was absolutely spoiled by u/polluxopera. Yeah, this smashing card is great, but it also came with do(ugh)nut soaps and sweary cat washi! The soaps legit smelt like baked goods and, at one point this week when I thought all shops would be empty forever and I’d never have food again, they were extremely tempting to me to start having a chomp on. I refrained. I haven’t seen Pollux around this forum in a week or so and I hope he’s ok in the chaos. I hope you’re all hanging in there.

Look after your health; both your physical and your mental wellbeing. Accept kindness and comfort and be kind to yourselves as well. The world will be very different in many ways after this, and I only hope that one of those ways will be in a rediscovery of the power of humanity and compassion in a time of global uncertainty. RAoC is a special place, but thank you, every single damn one of you here on this board, for being the part that makes it so special.

I am currently on my fourth day in a row without post, but Royal Mail claims that they are not going to stop services. So things may be a bit skewy on this end, but I’m grateful that I’ll still be able to receive your kind words and beautiful cards.

Stay safe, and wash your damn hands x