BLUF: Vaccinated, chipper tattooed 'thicc' male who is doing his best at mixing sexy thoughtfulness with kink. My big hands and eager mouth are calling out for someone who enjoys receiving impact and oral in one sitting.

So why should you message me?

You want to be spanked by someone that isn’t a complete weirdo or has toxic views on gender, politics, and kink.

You also read my personality and physical details and thought “sure, that guy sounds okay.”

Now to share my personality details from television cliches.

For the Gen-X’ers, I’m your classic CJ Cregg-type in that I’m tall, energetic and have been called Big Bird as both a term of endearment and as a pejorative. I can walk and talk with the best of them, never losing my energy and devotion to solving problems like how to make you shiver and quake!

For the Millennials, I’m your taller Ron Swanson (see notes) with the energy of Chris Traeger. I’ll always be excited to see or hear from you, but want to keep our appropriate spaces. With a love of classic furniture, I'm at the ready whenever you need to be bent over a dresser and thoroughly ravaged.

For the Zoomers, I have no idea how to describe myself through cliches that are relevant to you and honestly, I barely understand Tik-Tok outside of the ones about millennials creeping closer to their forties. However, that doesn't mean that I can't be fun!

My Look? (i.e. how do I sell you on my body?)

I’m your classic chubby dad bod that despite the curves can be put into rapid pulsing action that will surprise and amaze you. I’m taller than average at 6'4 with very broad shoulders and long arms and (great) legs. Basically, all of my body is proportionate to my height and shape, yep all of it. I consider myself relatively okay looking, well-manicured and very much drug and disease free. For those that care, I also have a hairy chest, a graying beard, and a splash of silver in my hair.