Hello! I’m a longtime lurker on a throwaway, finally posting for the first time.

To cut to the chase, I’m here because I’m somehow approaching my mid-20s without ever having even been on a proper date, but not for a lack of options, to put it bluntly. There were some boring factors at play: conservative upbringing, focus on school, and so on.

I consider myself pretty conventionally attractive — Asian, petite, nice smile, though boyish (small tits, short hair). My friends would be bewildered that I’m choosing to make this post instead of swiping on apps or going out with them to a party or whatever other people do.

Reddit is an unconventional place, but weirdly makes sense for my chronically online, introverted self. I’m a hopeless romantic, and I read a success story or two here that inspired me. In my wildest dreams, this leads to something real (sparks fly, I get to eventually “borrow” a hoodie from you during this cold season, we adopt a cat or two…).

All that said, I am very nervous about this whole thing. I’ve never done any of this before, and I’m placing a lot of trust into the void. I know I may be repeating the obvious and then some, but I would need respect, safety, privacy, honesty, communication, and consent to be a priority, with no expectation or hint of expectation of reciprocation (which I know is already in the rules). I would appreciate someone who has “done the work” and understands why women might “choose the bear,” and is patient and willing to take it extremely slow, establishing a genuine connection before diving in (ha).

If labels are important to you, I would call myself queer and possibly demisexual. I don’t have enough experience to say if I have a type, but I have been attracted to other queer androgynous folks in the past, whether women, feminine men, or nonbinary. Ideally, you are single, clean, similar in age (21-30?), can host (as I cannot, but I’m happy to travel wherever MTA can take me), and are a kind, decent human being.

I know that this is a place where people can be comfortable with expressing their explicit desires sometimes aggressively (and I’m happy for them!), but please bear in mind all that I’ve mentioned about myself and the caution I’m taking and feeling. I may be reluctant to share a photo of myself or other information until I feel comfortable, even after you already have. Please proceed with subtlety, care, and gentleness. Once again, I am NOT a curvy empowered goddess who knows what they want tonight, but a shy novice eager to discover and learn what I like for the first time (like I said, I was a good student) with a patient and enthusiastic partner who will actually enjoy joining me on this journey and is willing to commit to the slow burn. I understand that I may be asking for a lot, so please feel free to move on if this isn’t for you! Maybe I’m being too optimistic about this perfect match being out there after all these years, and them being online at this very moment to see this, but I’d like to at least try to give this a shot.

tl;dr title. I am very, very afraid but also very, very cute, which I’m hoping makes up for it. Make me feel safe, and maybe we’ll find love is real after all?

With all the disclaimers out of the way, if you’ve managed to read this far and are still interested, please send me a chat with a bit about yourself (age, location, profession/hobbies, physical description/face photo, favorite album, and what about my post caught your eye). Looking forward to hearing from you! :)

(p.s. I may be slow to respond, but if you don’t hear from me after 2 weeks, I promise it’s not personal, I might just not feel we are a fit and don’t want to waste either of our time!)