Having posted on this sub under at least one account (including a throwaway I had to nuke), I'm starting to wonder if something is wrong with me, or with the guys sliding into my DMs here?
In case anyone is wondering: yes, this is another throwaway account.
In spite of the nature of this sub, and in a short amount of time, I've been ghosted, flaked on, and burnt by guys giving me the "it's not you, it's me" speeches (which is THE WORST - what the hell are you doing sliding into my DMs with your emotional and psychological baggage?! I already have my own). This has done a number on my already flagging self esteem.
I get it if I'm not your type, and you're not mine; but if you can't walk the walk, don't talk the talk, you know?!
Is this normal, or am I just not made of sterner stuff by taking things too personally?
I've already deleted the app off my phone so I'm not obsessively checking, but yeah.
NB. I'd be amazed if the mods let this one through...
Yeah, finding a person that you align with is tough. Please don’t burn yourself out! I hope you have a lovely experience when you do find someone.
edit: this was supposed to be a direct reply to your message to mine, whoops.
I think what you’re experiencing is normal. It’s like those diagrams where you message 100 people, receive 30 replies back, and somehow you only really vibe with one or two people (or none at all). I’ve been told that I’m a time waster because I didn’t agree to meet up.. but?? it’s like..?!??! thanks for showing me your true colors!!!!!!!
I don’t take it personally and instead use it as a learning experience to amp up my bullshit radar. Unfortunately, I’ve met with some weird fermenting bad apples before acquiring the skill.
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- 10 months ago
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Yep.
Most of the men that I decline are pretty chill about it, but then you get a few people who just want to put you down. I’m sure there are women out there for them and they’ll have a wonderful time—I just know it’s not going to be me.