Highly sexed couple having an affair…male wishing to fulfil a fantasy and female wanting to taste her first pussy.

Now we’ve got your attention time to be self indulgent and talk about us.

Yes we are having an affair…if you don’t like that? I'd suggest we're not for you.

If you are a couple ~ no thanks… unless the Lady is both bi and plays solo.

If you're still reading this…that means you are indeed female and not put off about our "situation".

What we want:

A curvy female, aged between 28 and 45, ideally married or in a long term relationship (but it's not a deal breaker if you're not), smooth pussy (or small amount of hair), fantastic boobs and most importantly of all: an awesome personality!

What we DON'T want:

A dude/man/bloke/gent/guy - however you introduce yourselves, we're not interested.

People who don't take the initiative with chats or aren't able to take initiative in chats (if you haven't heard off us, send us a "good morning" message, why not start the chat for the day?)

Women with too much filler in their lips; a little is cool, too much and we'll be looking for the air valve on your lower back.

Women with tit tats, by this we mean people with big tats on their boobs; lines of script, flowers, that kind of stuff. We both have tats, we both like nice tats, but heavily tatted tits aren't for us.

What we can offer you We're a two-fer, why chat to one person when you can chat to two simultaneously!? We like to take things easy, we won't put pressure on you for anything (except for a selfie reasonably soon after starting to chat) We're very chatty, sarcastic and a little bit daft - as serious as we are about wanting a third, we don't take life all too seriously outside of work. We have VERY similar tastes in women, so don't worry about one of us being more attracted to you, we're also very body-positive and enjoy women with curves.

Still reading? You must be ticking the boxes!

So M is 36, 6’4”, from the North West, dark hair, refers to himself as having a dad bod with an average dick that’s girthy and clean shaven or as V puts it ‘the most perfect dick that she wants to suck all the time!’

V is 44, 5’8”, from the Midlands, curvy (yes I’ve a tummy on me) fake tits and absolutely covered in ink, tongue pierced and blonde and a very smooth tight pussy.

So you're aware, we both smoke (cigs only, we're not 420 friendly)…if you smoke yourself that’s a bloody bonus…3 of us starkers having a cig after cumming lots sounds bloody marvellous!

Still here? Christ almighty you are sounding perfect and you can read!!!

Sooooooo here’s the deal.

We live 100 miles apart and we come first (not like that you dirty mare)~ our relationship is important to us so we will only ever meet you when we are together…ideally a social meeting in a public place to start with…you might be weirder than us 😂

So given our locations, alas, we don’t get to see each other every week so getting to know you online via 👻 is an absolute must before a meeting is planned…no we aren’t saying show us your bits from the get go…friendship first then flashing and heavy flirting when we are all comfy with each other.

Christ almighty are you still reading this?!!

Pop us a message sugar tits!

You might have gathered this is written by V and M looks after the account.