Think about it.

What sort of obsessive behaviour does a male with an ROCD exhibit? Controlling? Picky? Fussy? Wants to know where the partner is at all times? Wants to be in charge of the partner's day-to-day? Wants the partner to obey? Wants the partner to ask before doing something or going somewhere? Wants the partner to attend to specifics just the way needed? Ah well....could go on and on.

Now, all of the above behaviour is well defined and accepted and admired and desired, in a BDSM lifestyle. The BDSM lifestyle accommodates pretty much every kind of nuance and quirk
and deviance and abnormal and unconventional preference or behaviour. In fact, there is more safety, respect, consent and joy in that lifestyle, than the traditional/ vanilla. It is like an unwritten moral code to honour and keep.

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So the question is, whether what seems to be a problem, really is a problem or it is just a swan among ducks? Perhaps the real problem is, that we try to confine each other in boxes of our own beliefs while completely dismissing the variety of the human mind.

There was a video I had watched a long time ago, by a professor/ doctor for mental illnesses and he said - Why do we have to see it as an OCD, label it as so and think of it as a problem per se? Instead, why not think of it as a creative behaviour, one that seeks and needs to try things differently? Not his exact words of course, but to that same effect.

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The beautiful moral here is that, just like a disabled person can be seen as 'differently abled', so can a person with an OCD, (relationship or general), be seen as differently likable. There really does not need to be a cause to see it as a 'problem' (unless it harms the person or others of course). Because the problem is really our closed minds, never how someone is not to our liking.

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Relationships are one of the most difficult human activities to navigate through life. The more we accept the infinite variety of our species, the better we make peace with it.