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I'm ssssoooooooooo tired of being a virgin. Over it. All of my friends have a body count and I feel left out. I just want to eat those blue Takis in bed while you thoroughly deflower me. If you're approaching retirement age, I'm interested. Nearing death? Even better. If you can't pass a cognitive function screening exam, or have noticed signs of early onset dementia I am interested. Catatonic husband's are HOT. If your life insurance policy is approaching maturation and you feel like your opportunity to bequeath your untapped fortune to a loved one is slipping away I am here for you.
Preferred age bracket: 78 Poor physical health a plus, particularly if paired with COPD and/or history of TIA. Looks don't matter to me because I really care what's in your heart 🥰. Let's get you one last sweet bang in that fancy reclining hospital bed you're confined to.
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- 7 months ago
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