If this post is up, you can still DM me

More selfies and pictures of my cat on my profile! If you're going to read ANY part of this post, I'd say the most important and valuable part to read would be the "What am I looking for?" section below.

Life is great, though it wasn't always that way! I have come a very long way with who I am as a person and where I am in life. I've hurt people, and I've been hurt by people. I'm tired, and I wish none of that upon anyone. I grew up throughout my teenage years with an MMO addiction which crippled my social ability as I grew distant from family, friends, had an online relationship, and eventually quit high school. Longer term, this didn't put me in particularly ideal circumstances.

Eventually took on University and got a job with a bank, and these two things combined began a journey of transformation. The professional environment with supportive and positive co-workers, to the forced study socials and pressures. I even studied in Sweden for 7 months as part of my degree, travelling Europe and meeting some of my online friends (cost me all of my savings at the time)!

A few years on, I now work from home, I can theoretically work whenever and wherever I want, so long as I'm available throughout work hours and make any required meetings. Quite often, I'll take extensive breaks throughout my working days and end up working in the evening a little instead. But mostly I try to get my working hours done between 8 and 4 (with a walk and a lunch break). My work is going exceptionally well and I am particularly career driven, given that I love what I do and my company is a great place to work with a lot of benefits and flexibility.

Last year, I taught myself how to crochet (see my profile for the post!) and it's made me realise the intelligence and skills I've acquired throughout my education can be applied to other things. So there's a few more things about that I'm going to try my hand at, but there's some things I need to prioritise around the house first.

The circumstances I grew up under have led me to be an extremely patient individual, and I try my best to be understanding and respectful of all kinds of people. I can't remember the last time I was genuinely angry, I don't get mad, I don't raise my voice. I mean, I raise my voice in rare occasions of frustration, or out of sarcastic jest, but it's never directed at or towards someone. Some might say that this would mean I'm a bomb waiting to explode, but it's been a couple of decades, I'm sure I would have by now. Especially with the breakdowns and pressures I had throughout Uni and other things. I'm more an emotional individual, I get sad and disappointed, rather than mad or angry.

• Recently watched Demon Slayer and caught up on Attack on Titan
• Recently watched The Witcher a second time, finished Brooklyn Nine-Nine
• Recently started Inside Job, currently watching The Boys
• Recently played Hollow Knight, Ori and the Blind Forest, part way through Horizon: Zero Dawn
• Grew up on Stargate SG-1, one of my favorite shows
• All time favorite band is Linkin Park (if similar music taste is a big thing for you, I do have a Spotify list I can share!)
• I don't smoke, no previous marriages, no kids
• Alcohol? Socially, rare occasions, maybe once a month at the most? Usually not even that often. I get a lot more relaxed and talkative and comfortable when I drink. I become much more 'cheery', 'lively', and 'optimistic'. As an example, let's just say my current job required I go through five interviews, the last three, I drank a bit half an hour prior to the interviews. I scored the job and it's been going exceptionally ever since. I also did better in those last three interviews than I did the first two. It eases my anxieties, but they ease up naturally over time once I get comfortable with people too

My day-to-day

I live by myself, with my cat, I have my own place, more space than I need. I clean (vacuum, mop, dust), I shop, I cook, I do all the laundry and keep my bed clean. I survive, but I barely feel like I'm prepared for adult life. I'm not sure how I have managed it this far! But I'm still going.

Around all that, and work, I'm mostly at the computer, watching anime, shows, movies, or playing games, or voicing with friends (sometimes whilst doing the previous things), Some times I go hiking over the weekends, some times my family visits, some times I visit them.

I don't have a lot of local friends nowadays, just a very small few, others moved interstate, and most of my friends are just online / international, some of whom I got to meet throughout my travels.

But, since I work from home, and my work is - for the most part - easily multi-taskable, I have a lot of opportunity to chatter throughout the day about all ongoings and things!

I recently watched Demon Slayer with a friend and started watching Jujutsu Kaisen with them, however due to time, we generally only get the chance to watch once or twice every couple of weeks, so it's slow progress! I finally got around to watching Attack on Titan Final Season Part Two, and I'm glad I did, it was the first time I'd binged an anime on my own and genuinely enjoyed it that much.

What am I looking for?

Someone to vibe with, get to know, friends, maybe something more? Friendship and trust can take time, and forming something beyond that can take even longer. However I do believe that, if you click and vibe with someone in the right ways, the process can be a little bit shorter, more so if you then continue to spend a significant amount of time interacting and conversing throughout the day-to-day. For instance, if you're seeing someone once or twice a week over the course of the year, I would say that interacting and conversing every day for 3-6 months is a potentially higher contributor to trust growth. It takes time and consistency to get to know someone, to learn about them. But, in terms of potential relationship, there's a few things you should know, I'm not here to hide anything. Let's chat for a while to start with and see how it goes.

I believe it's important, even in friendship, to develop a safe and welcoming environment, an environment where hiding things isn't necessary. Where you can speak your mind, speak your emotions (and even if you yourself disagree with them, you'll get support rather than hostility). Even if what you're thinking, or what you have to say, is condemning, or not so nice to hear - I value honesty above anything else, and so when someone is open and honest, I see no room for hostility or anger. I don't really get mad and I don't raise my voice, I try to remain respectful, considerate, even when faced with confronting and controversial perspectives. And even deep and personal things, I'm not here to judge you, I'm not here to tease you or laugh at you, I'm not here to kink shame you or think less of you because you're super obsessed with something that most people might find strange or odd. I want you to be the most you that you can be, because there's a beauty to be found in that, and if in doing so we don't really vibe or click - that's fine. That is not a reflection on you, or on I, some times that's just the way it is and it doesn't need to be seen as a bad thing.

My love language is touch. Intimate cuddles, snuggling, caressing, back scratches, giving massages of all kinds, hand holding, that kind of thing. However I am not a particularly sexual individual, it's something I am happy and open to exploring with someone, but I do not see it as a necessity within my relationship. But, that doesn't mean I don't have my perversions or can't be flirty, but it does mean that if I am those things, it is indicative of interest, but not necessarily indicative of sexual motives.

I want someone I can just share the experience of life with, have consistent attention from, give consistent attention to, watch things, play games with, travel, go on cute dates. Someone who compliments my intelligence, wit, and humour, and I theirs - something that may take some time for me to show. But, mostly, I play on the literal interpretations of ambiguous English in sarcastic jest and I will banter with you. For me, I like to text and chat to start with, and grow into potential calls - if it's any condolence on this matter, when I met my online friends throughout Europe, they told me I appear exactly the same in person as I did online. Calls are easier for me initially if it serves an alternate primary purpose, like gaming together, as this shifts the main attention to something else. It's a little less awkward for me. In saying that, I'm terrible at FPS and I have never played the Halo games, so if there is anyone out there in the same boat, I'd live to dive in and play through the games in co-op mode (release order), even more entertaining if we dive in on the hardest difficulty and stream it!

What does a relationship look like to me? Cute dates, walks, hiking, cuddles and watching things together, playing games together, or even just chilling in the same space and doing our own things (with chatter, or even completely undisturbed by one another). Sharing the chore load. Making sure we both have enough time and space to still have our alone and free time. And ultimately... trust, honesty, and communication, and these ones take time to build. It takes time to show someone that it's safe to be open about all the weird and unusual things, to be comfortable being quirky, and it takes time for the other to become comfortable too. I'm not here to judge, and I want to see you as you, be the most you that you can be!