This is my main reddit account, you can view my post history, I've never played Halo, I'm terrible at FPS, and if we vibe in chat and get along, how about we have some banter and fun over Halo? I don't mind if you've played them, but it'd be neat to play through (in release order) with someone else who hasn't! I wanna give it a shot on Legendary, and maybe stream it on Twitch, perhaps some drinks too? Time zone is ACST and would be looking at playing in the evenings (or even the mornings, at least over the next week).

This is going to be particularly long, you aren't expected nor obligated to read all of it, if you approach me with anything equally lengthy, I'll give it my attention and a respectful response. But, I'll start of with some general key points that may be relevant/important to you:

• Sex? One thing I like to start off with: I am ace friendly! I am not a particularly sexually driven individual, if you have a highly active sex drive, I may not be the right guy for you. I have some kinks, I'm open to flirting, open to exploring myself more with the right person. My love language is physical touch (think intimately entangled cuddles, fondling, caressing, providing massages, that kind of thing).
• Dossier: 5'11" (I don't care if you're taller, with or without high heels), Caucasian, 73kg, 30-32" waist, long hair (for looks/selfies, see my post history - you'll see my cat too!), Carnivore. I'd appreciate it if you sent a picture too, I'll understand if you don't or would prefer to chat a bit first! I'm not here to be creepy or weird, I'm not here to judge or invalidate people, I'm not going to think you're weird or strange no matter what you might tell me about yourself.
  
• Religion: Atheist, but I respect and can appreciate religion and cultures of all kinds!
• I do not smoke or do drugs, I'd prefer you don't either. One exception when I was in EU and had a special brownie.
• Alcohol, some times and socially, typically only special occasions or specific social meet ups (maybe 15-20 nights a year I'll have alcohol). I get talkative, bubbly, and extremely positive when I drink, my optimism peaks.
• Anime: Demon Slayer, Attack on Titan, Full Metal Alchemist (original and Brotherhood), Made In Abyss, Air, SHE the ultimate weapon (Saikano) - I haven't watched a lot lately.
• Video games: Recently played Limbo, Ori and the Blind Forest, Hollow Knight, currently playing Horizon: Zero Dawn, loved Fantasy Life an AC:NL on 3DS, I have a Switch but never finished Zelda BoTW. I have never played the Halo games and I'd love to find someone to play through them in co-op with on legendary (I suck at fps)! I loved Last of Us (haven't played the sequel yet) and I am INSANELY hyped for the HBO series!!
• Programmer and PC (discord) nerd.
• I like walking and hiking.
• I read some times (fiction).
• Netflix and chill actually means Netflix and chill (nothing else, not a metaphor ffs)
• Shows: Stargate SG-1 (a fav)m IT Crowd, Mighty Boosh, Black Books, Stranger Things, The Witcher, Dark, Gravity Falls, Rick and Morty, The Office, Seinfeld, Becker, Mr. Robot (never finished this one though), Final Space, Smiling Friends, House, Sherlock, Dragon Prince, Brooklyn 99,
• **Film&&: Marvel (though I'm behind a bit on some films), Disney, Dreamworks (HTTYD is fav), Don Bluff (Anastasia), Studio Ghibli, Weathering With you, Silent Voice, Your Name, Fantasy, Horror, Action, Comedy, I'll watch almost anything, especially if I get to watch it with someone!
• I watch subbed anime, I watch Netflix with subtitles on
• If I was four inches tall, I'd hide in your pocket!

So if you really want to know me.... I grew up as a young teen addicted to the internet, addicted to some MMO's (Flyff, Perfect World, Aion once free, Tera once free, Dragon Nest, played some s5league, GW2 in the early days), first online game was a toxic online environment and people were as selfish as they come. To thrive in these environments, I learned from others examples, I became manipulative and selfish, I cared not for the thoughts or feelings of others other than what it meant for me, how could I use them to get value out of them.

I'm not like that any more.

I had an online long distanced relationship (LDR) for a few years over the MMO addiction period. I ended up flying to the US and meeting them, it didn't work out (this was expected even at that point in time), but we'd been committed to one another and spent so much time online together over a few years, we didn't know how to cope without one another. Meeting was a means for things to either work out, or to not work out - it gave us our escape from one another.

During that time, I had quit high school and worked to save for the trip. When I got back and things didn't work out, I sought new work and eventually went back to study again. I eventually went to University and got a post graduate degree, I was in the top 5% of the degree and I spent 7 months studying and working in Sweden (travelling Europe). Pre-Uni and during Uni, I had a long-term relationship locally with a friend I met through other friends. We were still together while I was in Europe, but we mutually broke up shortly after my return. We'd both became so busy that we never got to spend time together and doing so felt more like a chore. We both became different people, and the relationship didn't get a chance to grow and adapt with that. This was fine, I was a bit relieved - the relationship had kind of been built up on some questionable foundations and intentions, it was nice, but didn't turn out to be what either of us were looking for. This breakup was in late 2019.

A year or so after that, one of the online friends I had met up with while travelling Europe started trying to flirt with me. She claimed her relationship was no longer meeting her needs. I did not engage, I told her she needs to communicate and talk with her partner and try to fix things, and if things can't be worked out or the relationship isn't providing her what she expects from it, then she needed to seriously consider whether it was what she wanted long term. Needless to say, we hit lockdown period and 100% work from home here in Aus, and I started interacting a lot more with my online friends, her included. Over quite a few months, she'd made several attempts at talking with her boyfriend, but he insisted it wasn't his problem, only her problem. He was an asshole, he was gaslighting her, getting angry and mad, yelling at her on voice chat, degrading her, blaming her for why they kept losing the games they played. She non-stop kept trying to flirt with me, and I seriously cherished our friendship, I had started to discover new levels of trust, being completely honest and open with ones thoughts, even if you yourself disagree with those thoughts. Trusting that, even if what you have to say isn't nice, or that the other person isn't going to like it, that you're being forward by trying to discuss it with them, they won't get mad, angry, or upset, they won't take offense. Creating a true welcoming environment where it's 100% safe to say anything, to relinquish any and all of your guilts, all of the things you're ashamed of, perhaps things you've never told anyone else.

At some point she had directly told her boyfriend she was seeking sexual attention from other people, and he seemed to shrug it off and not care since at the end of the day, she was with him. Ludicrous. Eventually I caved in, I was falling for her, I started flirting back, some things developed, she at some point confessed feelings, and so did I. We started calling a lot and watching things together. This was late 2020, and went on for about 6 months, I have since blocked her completely and deleted her everywhere, she had reached out a few times for contact and I let that happen, then yeeted her again. But, last time she reached out, I told her it was the last time I'd answer her. She manipulated me, emotionally, mentally. She used me to get what she wanted in the moment, she made me believe there was something there, she promised me the world, she made me feel like I was finally on track for something that would give me a purpose again. It was all on fake premises, I wasn't the only guy she was stringing along, and she moved from one guy to the next, like 5 within a year, with some of them at the same time.

It was difficult for me to do that, because despite everything that had happened, I had constantly re-assured her that, "no matter what you do, I will always be here". I made this promise, and I've always held my friendship of people to a very high regard, because it's an extremely difficult thing to obtain, thus once you have it, then I'm already pretty confident in my judgment of you. More so if I've known you for a considerable amount of time (in the above case, we knew each other for 3 years) and also met in person (which we had). So this was kind of a huge shot at my own dignity, my own reliability, it was as if I was killing the value of my own word and bringing my own judgment into question. I had to accept that, there are some lines that you can't come back from, and anyone is capable of crossing them. Such promises should not be made, or should be made even more weightly than I had in this case.

During all of that emotional mess, I was also shifting onto a new team at work, I was in a transition period, leaving one project and moving to another. New people. New environment. Nervous. Anxious. Thankfully, I wasn't the only one joining the team, someone else who was new joined at the same time, I wasn't alone. We adapted into the team quickly, I was always making everyone at work laugh, one member who sat elsewhere said they had to stop visiting because the pain from laughing was too much. Over about 8 months, we became really good friends (her and I whom had joined at the same time). We started hiking together every now and again, and doing other things, outside of work, I eventually asked her out and we tried dating. Things went great for about 4 months, but in all honesty, we didn't consider what we had to be a relationship, nothing really progressed beyond the amazing friendship we had. We'd hold hands, arms, we'd cuddle together, but not much else, although I'd consider this quite enough for where we were at, she disagreed. At the same time, there were other aspects that I knew wouldn't work for me long term, we broke up - this was in January 2022. We haven't talked since, which is quite sad, because this friendship was the first one I was able to be the most open and honest face-to-face, I was able to open up about things I'd never opened up about to anyone before. I was able to take those new levels of trust I had discovered and I haven't dated or anything since, I've been working on my career path and making good progress!

I have my anxieties, I have my depressive phases, I'm extremely self aware, emotionally intelligent, I am extremely patient. I understand depressive and down phases, I understand phases of needing and not needing attention (or other things), I understand unpredictability within ones wants and needs. I understand the online addicted life, the hunger for attention, the authority you can feel with the empowerment of your own ego. I am not an angry, mad, or violent person, I will never yell or shout at someone out of anger (only out of sarcastic jest). I'll do my best to communicate, I'll be open, honest, and as transparent as I can be, I'll understand that things can be hard and some times we make mistakes, I'll show reasonable forgiveness. Some times we need to be shown that the environment someone else can provide us really is safe for us to just be open and honest, to be who we want to be rather than feel pressured by what we think others think we should be.

The above isn't everything, I'll still have details or things for our potential conversation!