I'm not expecting much from this anymore, or from anyone, so I kind of figured I'd just be super real.

First of all, love is a chemical reaction and nothing more. There is no magic, there are no souls, there are no soul mates. It is simply an evolutionary response we have developed to procreate better, afaict.

I tried to believe that was fine, it's just how it is, but it feels good so why not still look for this so-called "love"? But then I discovered that I want too much love, from people that don't love me back. Maybe love is the friendships we lost along the way?

One of my friends from this shitty website has stopped responding to me. I understand that this happens, apparently, to everyone. I don't understand why. I tried hard to not open up, and just be "normal", and not over share or message too much, so when it would eventually happen, it wouldn't hurt too much. (I still messaged more, and was the last messaging for months to no one.) It does help that I don't care too much about losing her friendship, although it still hurts and is further proof that people just use people until they don't need them anymore.

I'm going to try to fall asleep now. I guess if this strikes you in some way message me. I'm in a pretty terrible mood but maybe I'll be nicer when I wake up.