Everything moves so fucking fast on the internet! Am I right? I'm not talking about the transfer of images and data at speeds 22 year old me only dreamed were possible. No, I'm talking about the speed at which feelings speed up and manifest into full blown things after only a handful of weeks. You're trading truths and telling each other things you trust very few people with - if anyone... it's fucking great isn't it? Until it's not. Then there's this space available again and you wonder if it'll ever be filled again... month to month. Heh, that's if you're lucky. These things usually last for a few, brief, glimmering weeks.

So yes, here I am once again, looking for that elusive new friend. I'm picky though and I have a few requirements that are important to me. If they're too high a bar for you, we're not a match.

First- Be single. Yes, I am looking for a friend. However, I'd like said new friend to have the potential to move to that place that's more than friends. The ENM thing doesn't work for me. Neither does Polyamory. I'm also not cool with cheaters. If it works for you- AWESOME! It's just not my jam.

Second, send me a message. DO NOT START A CHAT. If you can't be bothered to accommodate this simple request it does not bode well for our future communication or any potential play.

Finally, be over 40 or somewhere close. I'm 50 and while I definitely don't look it, I'm interested in some shared experiences and or generational touchstones. If you're closer to 30 than to 40, we're not likely to have many of those.

If you're still reading, here's a few things that may not be terribly obvious from my post history. I like to read, it's long been a favorite means of escape. Authors I enjoy in no real order: MC Scott, Guy Gavriel Kay, Stephen Donaldson, Glen Cook, William Gibson, Nigel Finley, Margaret Atwood, Madeline L'Engle(who could be blamed for sparking the scifi/fantasy interest in me). TV Shows: The Wire, Star Wars Rebels, Schitt's Creek, Bridgerton, Mythbusters, etc. My favorite comedy troupe is Kids In The Hall and comedian is George Carlin. If you were to create an animated character for me, it would be an even combination of Pam Poovey and Tina Belcher [I have the HR and Fan Fic to prove it].

I don't believe in guilty pleasures because pleasure should never be guilty. If it is, you're doing it wrong. Have a must watch suggestion for me, let me know- maybe we can binge it together. Wanna start a book club? I'm game.

Physical attraction is not the most important thing to me. I'm far more interested in your brain and how you're able to light mine up. That said, it may be important to you so here's a word picture, so we don't waste each other's time.:

She had the body of a Fernando Botero; thick and strong. A body shaped by resilience, resistance and the love of a splendid repast. Her skin was pale, unspoiled but for a single tattoo on her upper arm- near her shoulder. Hazel eyes; more green than brown glittered beneath her smooth brow, tendrils of wiry, medium brown hair escaped from the elastic of the band that restrained her thick and unruly curly hair. Full, soft lips belied a small mouth that stretched wide when a smile cracked her lips. Smile she did, as she knew it was her only really super power... The way she smiled, lit up her entire face and made her eyes sparkle with wit and more than a hint of whimsy. Her eyes appeared more or less green depending on what color shirt she was wearing, or the way the light hit them. The outer edges of her irises, a golden topaz that seemed to pick up whatever light is in the room, they glittered with mischievousness every time a wicked thought crossed her mind. But most important perhaps, was the fact that her smile touched her eyes and showed any who paid attention the depths of her heart. She was, finally, a woman unconcerned with the way the world saw her and that freedom made her incandescent...it radiated from her smile, touching all those within its range.

TLDR word picture Tall, Fat, Big Tits, Fat Ass

If you like voices, here’s mine:

https://soundgasm.net/u/Beezer73/How-Toys-Become-Real

It appears as though more than 5000(!) of you have listened to my voice recording...yet still I search.

If you're not afraid of feelings (yours or mine). Think there's something we should talk about, send me a message. Perhaps we'll click... go ahead, what do you have to lose?

You're bored, I'm bored... Disappointment Awaits

Prefer Single to Attached

Prefer Notes to Chats (choose send a message)

Prefer over 40