Why hello. Yes, I made a post about a month ago. So to save the trouble of rehashing the same ole spiel, you can check it out on my profile because now I just have more to say.

Firstly, I just feel very tired. Largely this is self inflicted, because I let myself get too close to someone too fast and ended up in a lot of pain. I let myself be deceived. So with the dust settling on that unfortunate spot in my life, maybe I'm ready to torture myself all over again.

Don't we all kind of find this to be a bit tedious? Isn't it a fucking miracle that two strangers can come together online and form a genuine connection? Have the same sense of humor, the same sensibilities, personality, hobbies or can otherwise meld into one another so perfectly that it feels like a dream.

Or maybe, that's not so great. Maybe you want an opposite, maybe you want to be challenged. I'm not sure if I'm like that. My whole life has been played so safe. My anxiety has left me with barely a life I'm satisfied with; but I didn't want to post here today in such a morose state, so we can move past this.

So listing more things that bring me just a little bit of joy in this world

Re-watching the same movie over and over again, even if it's just in the background. Even if I've seen it over 200 times. Even if I just use them to fall asleep to. This includes LotR Trilogy, Scarface, Network, Rosemary's Baby, The Exorcist, Shawshank Redemption and many more. They are all terribly comforting to me and I'll give no explanation on that.

Dogs dressed as people doing people things with human hands.

Curry. I could probably eat curry for breakfast, lunch and dinner everyday single day. Palak Paneer being far above any other. It just makes me so happy :)

Snuggling with my stuffed bear. Controversial and maybe a bit weird, yes, but there it is.

Also I'd like to add that I received about 40 messages and not one of them was disgusting or creepy, so hey, that's pretty cool. And if you still feel inclined to message me. That'd be pretty cool too. I will just be honest like last time and say it's highly likely I won't respond. I will be too terrified, but I hope I can be stronger. To try to act like a normal human being.

Anywho. Thanks for getting this far. M :)