What it do R4R30Plus! Long time lurker, first time poster. Love each and every all of you, and thought I'd come out my little shell to join you courageous bunch. Because that's what it does take, courage, to make yourself available and ready for new experiences, here or anywhere in life.

So here goes!

I hate people who wear socks with sandals and my favorite hobby is hating things. Not in a mean spirited or Mean Girls Book kinda way, but the way men make fun of each others haircuts and talk about banging each others moms. Half innocent and entirely kidding, maybe a little serious because We-All-Saw-How-She-Looked-At-Me.

And I'm not trying to make a statement but I am always trying to lighten the mood, ricocheting between nihilism and finding laughter and meaning in my life from the simple act of crying. Whether it's watching videos on Youtube of dogs reuniting with their owners, or kids crying about the vinegar in their eyes. (Please look it up.)

Being mean with a kind heart is the closest to sincerity I think exist, because I've broken bread with very nice people and they always end up being the very fucking worst. I was going to make those last three words a link to someone who morally disappointed us but you've had enough of that.

Let's be the worst and most honest possible version of ourselves, for once, see if the nasty matches and take it from there. Make some jokes have some fun and hate everything and ourselves a little less. I watch and read honestly everything from Dr. Phil and Real Housewives of Atlanta to Steppenwolf and They Should Serve Beer In Hell. Above love or friendship I desperately seek sincerity, which I think is so far and lacking in all interractions.

Note that this is not an invitation for malspirited and nasty (or "toxic") vitriol. Come at me with a good heart or don't come at me at all.

Best luck to you!