hey friends. this post might be long, let's see if you find it worth it. if you don't read to the end, you probably aren't the person for me and that's okay! i hope you find your person.

i'm a socially anxious bundle of nerves. like, i've genuinely mastered the art of overthinking and i could most likely make a flowchart of why that one awkward moment from three years ago still haunts me. i grew up in a house where "tough love" was the norm, hugs were pretty rare and "i'm proud of you" wasn't exactly a frequent flyer. it was cold, not exactly the cozy "snuggle up with a blanket" kind of cold, but the kind that makes you run towards warmth the second you get any. so guess who gets love bombed a lot? 🥴

because of that, i've always tried to be the opposite. i give love freely, and i try to make others feel seen and appreciated. i'm really good about making sure that if someone is talking and they are spoken over, i interrupt and make sure they get to finish what they were saying. my current circle is wonderful and i'm so grateful for them, but honestly, i'd love to grow it a little. being surrounded by laugher, love and those genuine "hey, this person gets me" moments feel like actual magic, and i need more of that in 2025, so let's get some people in my life who bring that.

that said, friendships can be tricky for me. i adore my friends but sometimes, i pull back into my own shell and take space to recharge. so, i don't take well to pushy people and people who are aggressive about response times. it's never been because i don't care; it's just the way i cope with my own fears/feelings. i have been working on it though, because i know how amazing it feels to have those deep, long-lasting connections. if you're into things like:

• cats, sarcasm as a love language, sending videos/random voice notes at 1am when i can't sleep/tik-toks, all animals, cozy hoodies/snow/fall, if you're a hard pass on florida? yeah me too, pretending you're going to get your life together by buying cute office supplies that you'll never use, gaming whether it's fps/cozy games, lovingly teasing friends in a way that says "yeah hi i care about you but man, you're ridiculous", olive green, pens, sweet tea supremacy, mountains

i'm into gaming a lot but not as much as i used to be (which is temporarily, thanks burnout). overwatch 2 is my main focus but let's talk about what you like (please no league, WoW or final fantasy -- but you can tell me how much you love them, i just can't enjoy them and i've tried so many times). teach me the ways of enjoying games outside of my game choices, just ask me what they usually are (or see my gp post) and we'll talk about it.

anyway, here's the thing: i'm working on being more social and open but i'll need a little patience. i promise i'll try to make it worth it though. once i trust you, i'll laugh at all your jokes (even the really awful ones), send you random cat pics, and stick around like a cat who has decided your porch is home. i'll always root for you, even if it's sometimes from afar.