It's my favorite time of the year. Golden hour happens early; the sunlight streaming through the trees turns to shifting red-orange hues in a way that only happens for a few weeks per year. Walking down the sidewalk, I can smell slowly mulching leaves tinged with the smoke from a distant fireplace or charcoal grill. I'd like to be in the mountains or a forest, sitting on a porch as the sun sets. There was a time when I'd make this long weekend a vacation every year; unfortunately, tonight my obligations keep me closer to the city, home, and humanity.
Winter is coming and humanity feels more polarized than at any other point in my lifetime. Anxiety is the word of the day; as we teeter on the edge I push myself to recognize the experiences worth saving and it helps keep me grounded. I don't know what the future will bring. I have hope but I no longer have expectations. This is freeing in a way, but I am in touch with my feelings enough that I'm painfully aware of how it interacts with loneliness. Facing uncertainty is always easier with companionship.
I hope you're doing well out there, fellow redditors. I hope that you are able to find joy in the world as it is, while working toward the world as it could be. I hope that you have companionship if you want it, or whatever level of human contact meets your needs for community. I hope that you are content for a moment, an evening, a weekend. If this post resonates with you and you feel comfortable, say hello or recommend me a book for these lonely evenings. Maybe we can keep one another company for a while.
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