First I type a response that I know will excite me, then tease myself by debating whether or not to send it.......'hmmmmmm, should I send it or not? O what the hell, send it and see what happens!!' Then I giggle and hit send and BOY do I get excited when I see that notification button light up!! Then more teasing.....should I accept the chat request or not? Or should I just keep myself waiting? Will I? Won't I? O the thrill of it! But inevitably I accept it, what the hell, I wanna see what happens! Will I get flirty and dirty with myself right away? Will there be chemistry?? Or just a quiet fizzle? Or, even worse, will I ghost myself after everything seems to go so well?? Oh I hope not!!!

But today I need your help, cuz I'll be going into the hospital for a few days and won't be able to reply :(((( Don't worry, it's nothing too serious.....for me, anyway. You see, I'm a pubic hair donor (as well as a regular organ donor, of course), and I finally got the call! An unfortunate young man in Walla Walla Washington suffered a horrible industrial accident recently and now faces a long road to recovery and the possibility of life without pubes! The doctors think I'm a good match so I'm on my way there now (private jet!!!) but once I land I won't have access to my phone so won't be able to reply. I'll be in an operating room for several days while they painstakingly remove my pubes one by one and transplant them into that poor fella. And then it's just about letting nature take its course and hope his body doesn't reject them. Your prayers are certainly welcomed.

Anyhoo, that's why I need you ladies to reply to me today, cuz there's no way I can do it myself. So please, if my good deed and wholesome Canadian pubes are worthy, a reply would be a nice reward. I thank you in advance, and remember- sign your donor card!!