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I haven’t written you a letter since I was maybe 12. I think that was the last Christmas I actually made a list and asked for something specific as a present. Actually, that’s not true. I may have asked for an iPod when I was 15. But I think I’ve been really good this year so here’s what I want.
I want someone to distract me this holiday season and that I can get to keep long term. Ideally he’s a cool guy and there’ll be some spark between us. In terms of specifics, I’m hoping he’s my age/late thirties, single, with a fun personality and able to hold his end of a conversation. Please let him have a pretty smile. But most importantly, I hope he doesn’t send half-assed messages, only to ghost a few days later.
I know I’m being picky, but the guy I want:
- can handle a little sass, wits and flirty banter;
- thinks pineapple has NO business on pizza;
- will enjoy watching hockey with me (LGR!);
- will dance with me even if he doesn’t know how to;
- is not above drinking games and taking shots together;
- enjoys late nights talking about everything and anything.
Santa, I haven’t asked for ANYTHING in a really long time, so I’m hoping you’ll come through this year. If you find him, let him know he can write saying hi, including his name, age, what he looks like. And if this person doesn’t exist, well, I guess just get me a plane ticket to Tahiti, a new bathing suit and unlimited piña coladas and I’ll be happy with that too.
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