I've tried writing this 3 times and I have deleted it because it just never looks right. So, I am just going to go with the basics and if this resonates with you then great.

About me:

I'm in my 30's (oh look we may have something in common.)

I laugh at inappropriate times. (Like if someone yells at me I will laugh.) I'm probably what Hozier was talking about when he said "She's the giggle at a funeral." - I will also cry when things happen in fictional worlds -like when characters die, etc..-

I'm pretty R rated. I am intelligent, but you will hear expletives often. I also do not really have a filter so innuendo's and puns are quite common. (Side note: When I am texting with my phone, my thumbs make horrible typos. Make fun of me for them, it's ok.)

I read a-lot, but I hate self help books. If you recommend me a self-help book I will side-eye you into next week and then read said self-help book while anxiously try to figure out what you think is wrong with me. - That is, if we are established friends.- I mainly dally in horror, dark, crime, mystery things. Although I am a sucker for sci-fi and will probably text you at some point about alien *eggplants* (Idk what's allowed to be said on here).

I can talk online about anything, but if you were to ever meet me in person, then you would probably find me in the back of the room with my back against the wall where I can make a hasty retreat or in the best view for people watching. I like to watch people and make up what conversations they are having in my head. It's fucking weird and I know it, but if you are my friend then you should know this is one of my habits.

I'm not looking for a relationship. *insert Halsey's Bad at Love lyrics* I can tell you a thousand reasons why I make an amazing friend though. #1 I don't have any and you will be the sole attention getter of friendship-land.

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Hopefully this works and I find someone that vibes with me. I am coming off a book high where this girl had a killer friend group and I am just fucking really missing that kind of connection.

So, if you think this is you, send me a chat and let me know about you.. Hopefully with some detail.

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