Well hullo there. Big baldy beardo here.

Looking for someone local to fall for in the worst way (Not asking much, eh?) I have all the time in the world, and then some, to share with the right person. So if you're about talking to someone morning, noon, and night, feeling your heart flutter when your phone lights up, we might be on the same wavelength.

I'm a bit of a homebody, and that's not something I'm massively looking to shake up, but having someone eager to get out and about from time to time, get into misadventures on a whim, roll the dice at the train station and get stranded in Rochester or something? Sounds like fun to me.

Also pretty guarded at first, so anyone looking for a quick night of fun is probably better served by the dozens of other subs on here that are more in that vein.

A suite of little ambitions I have, if any of them resonate with you, that is probably a good thing.

- My perfect front room is his and hers TVs so that my partner and I can game together/in parallel in glorious harmony.

- I really want a Dachshund. I love dogs up and down, but recently I have become enamoured with the little sausage sods, so working towards that.

- I want to watch the sunrise on a grotty English beach to stoke the flames of nostalgia.

- I need to get to an aquarium. Definitely not because I'm a secret merman or anything, just like the fishies.

- When it warms up again, I want to start arting out and about. Full park bench action! Get some delightful scenery down on canvas.

- I'd love to visit more restaurants. I have the palate of a relatively abused dumpster, so I don't know good from bad, and could probably do with developing a better appreciation.

So if you wanna talk a whole heap, see if we make sense to meet and grab a drink or whatever it is people do these days, sling me a hey and tell me the stupidest plot point you've ever seen is?