This is gonna be long, so buckle up! I’m naturally a paragraphs person, and if a two-page essay about me feels like too much, you probably aren’t going to enjoy me a lot either.

About me: I’m single, polyam, bi-romantic demi/ace looking for a long-term relationship. I know it’s not something you wave a wand and make happen—and I personally hate to rush things, but I ask anyone replying to this post to be open to that. The perfect scenario would be something starting as friendship and progressing into a romantic partnership.

I’m okay with an LDR as long as it’s manageable to meet in person and eventually close the gap when it feels right. Dating locally proved to be hard given a pretty conservative environment. When people find out I’m non-monogamous, they assume I’m wanting a fwb situation. Being ace and autistic on top of that, well, you can imagine. I don’t fall in love often, and I hope it’s out there for me, beautiful, vulnerable, and terrifying at times.

An extra paragraph to address asexuality as it tends to raise a lot of questions. I don’t usually experience sexual attraction towards people, but I’m somewhere between sex-neutral and sex-favourable on the ace spectrum. This means sex can be cool and fun if the connection is there, although definitely not the key element in a relationship for me.

Something we can bond over:

• Games. I’ve recently finished modding Morrowind into something more fast and stable yet vanilla-friendly, and god it still feels great! I love story-rich and text-based tittles as much as silly little games with unusual mechanics. Some of the games I’ve recently enjoyed: Roadwarden, Pentiment, Inscryption, Kingdom New Lands/Two Crowns, Stardew Valley, 80 Days, Astrologaster, Stacklands. In a love-hate relationship with the Sims series, mostly hating on Sims 4 and getting back to Sims 2 over and over again.

• Neurodivergency. I’ve been recently diagnosed with autism and strongly suspecting an accompanying ADHD. Most of my irl-friends are also autistic, and I noticed that I click with ND folks way more often.

• Books. I’ve read 50 books last year but don’t really have a favourite author or genre. It’s been more of an experiment to read as I used to as a teen, going blindly based on random recommendations or picking a book with a cool looking cover. I love memoirs, non-fiction that dives into some very specific topic, and sci-fi.

• Languages. I speak Ukrainian, Russian, Spanish, obviously English, and just started learning German. Random linguistics/translation/etymology facts fascinate me, and if I happen to have a crush on you, I’ll probably start frantically learning your language way too soon.

Some more interests: true crime, Dropout shows, musicals, houseplants, dogs.

About you: when it comes to attraction, I’m more often driven to soft-masculinity regardless of gender. Height/weight doesn’t matter, but I’d prefer if you date solo (not as a pre-existing couple looking for a third) and have no kids—I’m child-free and don’t want to date parents either.

Dealbreakers: people who say they are “drama-free”, “fluent in sarcasm” at someone else’s expense, and “don’t take themselves too seriously”. Someone who’s not interested in politics or holds conservative beliefs; has an extremely NSFW profile; is a poor communicator and generally has a hard time being open and vulnerable. I’m looking for people not way too older or younger than me, somewhere in the 25-35 yo window.

Please introduce yourself with something more than “hi”, include a picture of you, and let me know why you felt driven to reach out. If it looks like you just need a woman-shaped warm body, you disregarded some parts of the post, your very first message is super low-effort or makes me uncomfortable, I’m not going to reply. Seriously, I don’t need 100 messages in my inbox, I’m looking to connect with people who (hopefully) felt genuinely excited to know me.

There’s a picture of me in my profile. And that’s all, thank you for reading!