It started with a delta 8 disposable pen that my friend had. I lived in TN and was the ripe old age of 16. He told me about weed that he used to smoke in Illinois and eventually got his hands on a pen. I of course took a hit cus I didn’t want to look like a pussy. I ended up loving it.

That lead to me smoking weed with him and eventually getting some weed for myself. I learned how to roll blunts and smoked a few times in my backyard late at night so my parents didn’t catch me. Eventually I got caught for sneaking out and smoking and was sent to live with my grandparents to get off the grid. They took my phone, my car keys, and any money I had. So I was forced to not smoke.

By then I hadn’t quite developed an addiction as I just smoked when I could without getting caught, and my parents were stringent and hard to sneak around. So I probably got to smoke once a week.

As time went by I eventually went back home, got kicked out, and ended up in a friend’s trailer in a legal state. I started again. I had a job to pay for the weed and my friend was letting me stay in the trailer for free, so all I had to pay for was my habit and my car insurance , maybe my phone bill.

I smoked as much as I could afford to, about three times a week. I was getting decent weed from a dispensary plug I had at the time, so I was living in a fog it felt like.

I lost my job which lead to me moving in with another friend, in a different town. In about a week I had spent all the money I had left on weed during my search for a new job. I had to work around my friend’s grandma, as she hated weed and anytime she smelled it she’d tear the house apart.

Eventually I got a place with a roomate and a decent job. I could afford my rent and to smoke regularly. So I did. I smoked every day after work, and when I was off, all day, which eventually lead to me hitting dispensary carts while on the clock, until finally I was living my life high.

Since then I’ve moved in with my fiance and gotten a new job. I don’t smoke at work anymore, but I am sure to be high anytime I’m off work.

And now the results of that mental and physical abuse of my habit. First of all, I can’t breathe well. I wake up several times at night gasping for air having to cough phlegm from my lungs, I do the same on the morning, I get random coughing fits that just lead to more chest tightness, and when I smoke I pay the price of a 5 minute coughing fit every bong rip I take, every dab I take, every joint I hit. But I can’t stop. I’m so mentally dependent by now that without I feel like I can’t eat, I’m more emotional, irritable. Not me. I’m afraid to rlly attempt to quit because I know it’s going to suck so bad and I will have to try so hard to keep my job while quitting. That being said. I know I need to for the good of my health.

If there is any advice you could offer me, or you have experienced similar problems and got thru it, please send your thoughts my way. I rlly need it right now. Because I know what I have to do but I’m dreading doing it.