I’ll just start with saying I’ve only been smoking about a year but that year has been more or less stay high all the time I worked with a guy who smoked a lot and I didn’t want anything to do with it at first but he kept trying to get me to try it and I think it took 4 months till I hit a thc vape and we had a great time it took the boredom away made everything fun but now I’m addicted have been for a while but what I’m wondering about is it’s like I’m stuck in my own head all I can do is basically say how could u do that how could u have gotten this far I’ve lost my relationship with my parents I’m 19 still live at home and that’s not what I’m worried about it’s just for one we’re church going people always have been so they can never know there strongly against it everyone I know is either heavily against or for it and I can’t stop thinking that’s honestly the best way to describe it idk if that made sense but I already know how Can someone just honestly not know what’s wrong.

Edit idk if this means anything but the amount that I eat and not like not having the munchies anymore I mean like I wake up go to work come home I don’t eat till get home and even then barely and that’s it I’ve also lost sense of time basically it’s like I’m living in now and that’s it and I can’t stand the way it feels like I’ve given up everything just to smoke weed and now I don’t wanna do that but I can’t stand going without it and the freezing I’ve never in my life been sweating and shivering at the same time before