Here is a cool quote I once came across on youtube:

"The Jungian concept of "Anima" is really helpful here, the idealized feminine that lives inside every man, as the character acts as a screen for your mind to project its ideals onto. So it really is loving a part of yourself. As Jung says, an amount of projection is necessary for the initial attraction of romantic partners, both being blinded by their anima and animus projections. A deeper level of love can only commence at the pivotal moment when the humanness of your partner breaks through the projections and you are forced to become mortals once again."

What does it mean to have a sexuality? It means you have this GENDERED ideal in your head that you seek. It exists in the head of virtually every human being. To "get a liking of someone" romantically/sexually is to project these ideals successfully onto another human being. When it's reciprocated and two-way, that's what they call chemistry. It's literally projection, and as Jung says, that's inevitable.

Bluepill pretty much entirely focuses on the "deeper level of love that can be achieved when the humanness of your partner breaks through the projection". That's ALL that these progressive, non-sexist, woke people are willing to focus on (generally).

Redpill on the other hand is fully hung up on the initial projections, on the surface level of the human experience of (hetero)sexuality. THAT level is undeniably asymmetric imo, but it's merely the surface.

The surface is important, because it will always exist. People can grow and mature, in this context this means that they get more self-aware about their own projections, and recognize that there is something deeper past it. On that deeper level, things obviously get much more complicated, and indeed much less generalizable, because we are all indeed complex human beings that are living similarly complex lives. Connecting with someone on this deeper level is what we should strive for, but again, every single person will start off on the surface, and will have to individually grow past that (and one of the most "natural" course of that growth is through having a learning experience with the opposite sex, unfortunately).

The way men relate to their anima and the way women relate to their animus, it's different. And both genders can get too hung up on it, get stuck in a shallow version of attraction. That being said, I would like to emphasize another part of that opening quote: "So it really is loving a part of yourself."

The goal isn't to entirely get rid of these projections. Grinding our teeth and stubbornly refusing to even look at them is not healthy. It's a delicate balance, but we should be in peace with these ideals of ours, we should nurture them on some level while not getting TOO attached to them, and also being considerate and aware that this "ideal seeking" affects other people around us. We can never fully get rid of these projections. Ever. A person without these gendered ideals is a person who is either attracted to everyone without any sort of selectiveness, or to no one. That's not realistic for most people.

Men's anima is usually more about seeking some sort of beauty, cuteness, a feeling of endearment, and it's more of a physical and eager drive. When men are shallow, this morphs into objectification.

Women's animus is about being impressed by someone awesome, competent and charming. That's what women seek, and it's more of a mental/emotional drive. When women are shallow, this morphs into hypergamy.

Meaningful, deeper relationships are possible, and we have to fight our ways through the surface for that. I'm convinced that refusing to acknowledge that level is not the best way to do it, especially when basically all avenues of dating (dating apps being the most notorious ones) are deeply reflecting the asymmetry of the surface. It's almost inhumane to not acknowledge that, and this is why I think the name "redpill" is actually sort of fitting (even though I obviously think redpill has a lot of issues.) In a sense it IS looking at a "hidden truth". It's hidden, because the progressive side of the world is literally too uncomfortable with even taking a honest look at it.

We have no reason to be afraid of these things. Regardless of our "true nature", we already progressed quite a bit. But I think it's about time to collectively grow the fuck up and make peace with the messiness, the complexity and yes, the asymmetry of women-men coexistence. "Yaay we are all human beings" is simply not the full picture, and in my opinion it never will be.