Self harm has begun a majour issue in my life. Ever since psychosis self harm has begun a huge issue. Self punishment has becone my new thing. The more i feel pain the less the psychological pain is I guess.. does anyone else feel this way..

If reality isnt capting up with me, i try and seduce it to come now with self harm and disobedience.. my life is consumed with thoughts im dead and livjng in my own fucked up perception of hell. I seriously believe im dead and im in hell.. the most collaborative shit has been said to me in the instances of "voices in my head" they fucking know more about my life from day dot to know than I fucking do. Every dirty secret every thing ive forced to forget and repress.. everything ive done on and off drugs.. everything ive ever thought or considered. For all things straight and real.. I believe im dead and in my own personalised hell . I Believe heaven is a place on earth.. just as your own personalised hell could be too...Angels living amongst demons. Your heaven is your perception of heaven on earth..my perception of hell is as it is on earth. Basically heaven and hell live simultaneously on earth... those that believe in heaven co exist with those in hell... taunted by their own perception of hell .. and those in hell have THEIR OWN demons to defeat i n their "HIGHLY PERSONALISED HELL"