1. First mushroom trip (1.5g) - super positive and emotional. Eye mask, in bed, noise cancelling headphones and the Johns Hopkins playlist. It allowed me to process grief over a loved one who died suddenly very recently - during the trip I cried like I never have in my life and felt happiness at the same time. I can now think about what happened without being upset or feeling like I need to cry. Later in the same trip I came to terms with the fact that I'm bisexual. It was like years of therapy condensed in a few hours, and it felt incredibly positive the entire time.

2. First MDMA use (a week later) - pure bliss and love and positive emotion, amazing 4-6 hours. I spent most of it listening to music and journaling about all sorts of things in my life. The week after taking it I had an amazingly positive afterglow - light and positive mood, smiling more, more positive attitude towards other people, never felt better in my life just doing mundane boring things. I've been diagnosed with depression and it's like it was lifted overnight, we'll see how long it lasts. Very pleasantly surprised given all the MDMA comedown stories. It's too bad you can't do MDMA more often.

3. First LSD trip (100mcg) (a week after the MDMA, two weeks after the mushrooms) - positive but certainly the most meh of the three - felt good and happy but not very emotional, enhanced visuals and perception, enjoyed just looking at the light coming through my window, lying on the floor listening to music, trying out food (highly recommend frozen berry mochi). Five hours in I got a bit bored, wasn't sure if I hit the peak or not yet, kind of disappointed that it wasn't as deep and profound of an experience as the others, then I just took a cannabis edible, and did whatever at home. Might be that I expected too much, might be the recent mushroom and MDMA use, but I found it a bit underwhelming. For next time I think I need to plan some better activities too.

I still have a long list of things that I want to experience - 2CB, DMT, candy flip, higher doses of mushrooms, tripping with other people - but I want to pace myself and take at least 3 weeks off to make sure that I'm grounded and healthy.