Im young 21, turning 22 soon. Ive had countless deja vu moments ever since i can remember. Add alot of psychedelic experiences into the mix and i could say ive spent eternity questioning why. My thing is, and this might sound insane holy shit... bear with me as I try to explain what im getting at.

Exhibit A. I often have had moments where its like the truman show effect, where everything feels simulated/fabricated... Quite literally everything down to like gravity bro. Once I get here, I feel like a part of god/ or maybe even like god. and I get into the headspace that I created this whole reality for my own pleasure, and that brings me guilt, but then I snap back into the moment and enjoy the music festival, or the hangout, or whatever im doing and try to appreciate the moment.

Exhibit B. Ideally theres the yin yang right. But often times I have a hard time trusting the creator of this shit, Imagine a painting (this is the reality we live in)... all the dark colors/shadows are bad/evil things. The bright colors/lights are good things probably. And then hopefully a beautiful painting is created by the end of the painting being finished Right? But why tf would the artist (god/creator) even make the painting in the first place. when we could just be frequencies, and like harmonic energy bro. Like i wouldve been fine with a more minimalistic painting.

combination of the two exhibits makes me feel like im being toyed with...

Then i think im thinking too much, and its MY fault for looking into the abyss or uncovering the veil or whatever. But holy shit was it crazy the first time. over time with these spiritual expereinces, ive been just trying to be a good person, eat food, exercise, spread love, and just exist as an animal in this planet...