I've been in "romantic" relationships before where the man I was with wasn't physically attracted to me, and it was really painful to endure. When I started dating this time, I said I was going to date someone who prefers a plus size woman, and that's what I've set out to do.

The problem is, though, that too many of the men I've talked to who say they prefer plus-size women have been awful. They've rushed to talk about sex, told me things about themselves that made me feel afraid, and expressed some pretty vile opinions. It's made me feel like these men just want an insecure woman who will put up with their crap, and they expect that a plus-size woman will be insecure enough to do that.

I feel so stupid even asking this, but are there actually decent people out there who are more attracted to a size 16 than a size 6? Because I'm having suuuch a hard time finding someone who likes my body and is also capable of just being kind & normal to me and not scaring me or sexualizing me too much too soon.