Last night, I was frustrated and my emotions were a mess, I suddenly realized something. Over the past year/s that I've been dealing with emotional distress, my heart felt that my mind have forgotten all the joyful events in my life. I cried. I got scared.

Yes, losing loved ones is excruciatingly painful. But if I am to lose the memories, joyful memories with people who I love the most and even those who were only part of my character development, might as well my heart be stabbed because I may not be able to live if I am to forget it.

With my faith, I've convinced myself that everything happens for a reason. I've accepted that it needed to happen. But I won't bear it if the only hope that gave my spark back would be forgotten. Yes, it was painful. To a point like my soul died. But please give me a chance to survive by making me remember that living life is magical. A ray of sunshine and of hope. "This is just a challenge or hiccup that needs to be overcome for me to see the rainbow once more.

So please, take away the pain but not the joy.