It’s gonna be a long post. I think out of all the groups here on reddit I feel like PanganaySupportGroup is the one closest to my heart as it feels like my safe space, so please bear with as I need to send out my wishes into the internet. Feel free to use this post to comment all your panganay wishes as I’ll collect it in my heart and blow it to my birthday candle.

Every year, I’ve always written down my birthday wishes even if I know it’s not gonna happen. Writing it makes me feel like there’s hope.

1. Since my life threatening diagnosis, I’ve come to accept that life is temporary, and if ever death comes, I wish that I have served my family and friends well. I wish I had in my own may made someone smile or made another person’s life easier.

2. I wish my family would change, for the better. I wish they would realize that I am already tired of fixing things for them, I have my own life to fix too.

3. Right now, I hope I become financially stable. It’s one of the key solutions to my problems in life, I don’t want it to be extravagant, I just want food on my plate, a roof above my head and a little convenience in my day to day life, this way I can help my family more.

4. I’m already 29, and the fear of growing old alone gives me creeps. I hope I’ll meet someone who’ll be loving, accepting and will be there for me unconditionally.

5. Hopefully as life gets more and more difficult, I wish I would still be in touch with reality. I hope my sanity will be intact. The older I am the lonelier I get, and I can’t even remember when was the last time that I was genuinely happy. I hope someday I would find that too.

Happy Birthday! You’re kind. You’re smart. You’re important. Your younger self is proud of you. Keep going.