Hello!

It's a monday morning and I'm crying while eating my ube cheese pandesal.

I'm 29F and I've built my EF and savings. I've been working hard to pay for our food, water, and electricity bills. Okay okay lang naman. I have a decent salary naman. I managed to save enough to pay for a downpayment for a piece of land.

This weekend, I discovered that my parents haven't been paying the house mortgage for more than a year now. The interest and penalties have rocketed because they weren't paying even for the minimum monthly payments. I was fuming mad. They should have told me. I could have given them my life savings. Di na sana aakyat ang interest. But they said, they didn't want to burden me. Naiintindihan ko rin naman, nawalan rin tlaga sila ng kabuhayan dahil sa pandemic and it was me who requested them to stop working.

But I can't stop feeling like I'm drowning in quicksand. I'm almost 30 and I haven't built anything for myself. Ang pinakamahal ko na sigurong nabili para sarili ko ay isang laptop. Ang bigat ba sa pakiramdam na wala ng natitira sa sarili mo. I can't help but think that if my salary is for me alone, I could have bought a condo or a car. Parang napagiiwanan na ako.