Bukod sa pagiging retirement plan, bakit feeling ko parang nagiging entry nila ako sa competition for the best son/daughter?

I’m a graduate of civil engineering (25) pero hindi ko pinractice kasi it was never my passion. Gusto nila may engineer sa pamilya pero I only took the boards once then failed. My parents would ask me nang paulit-ulit to take the boards again. Pero ayaw ko. A part of me also doesn’t want kasi ayoko sila sundin.

Then my mom would give me these remarks about her officemate’s child na nakabili na ng bahay, naka-invest ng kotse, etc. And I was just quiet and nodding. “Kuya, sana mabili mo kami ng kotse/sana makalipat tayo ng bahay.”

Hindi ako makasagot kasi I don’t know what to say. I don’t even know kung kaya ko lahat ng ‘to—yung pressure, yung expectations sakin. For now, I’m just happy I get to contribute tuwing kinsenas at katapusan for our bills. I also got an insurance.

I know na gusto lang nilang umoo ako. Gusto nilang may panghawakan na pag-asa, pero paano kung kahit ako hindi ko makita yun for myself? I just don’t want them to be disappointed.

They wanted me to be that son na successful in life, pero hindi ko pa alam. Malayo-layo pa.