Not your typical infatuation-fuelled and horny confession (and my first)

This is from way back in 2014, when Lahore DHA did not have these fancy underpasses and phase 6 was still a barren uninhabited wasteland.

Typical december friday night, got into my car, picked up two friends from phase 5, on our merry way to score some booze from our dealer in firdous market. It was 9pm ish, and ofcourse, as any uni student would have it, smoking up and hot boxing inside the car was a norm at that time. As we turned right towards ghora chowk, we see a couple on the bike being harrassed by teenage (not sure) biker boys. I remember there were atleast 4 bikes, harassing the woman. We were stoned, but that did not stop us from being chivalrous idiots, and my friend on the passenger seat rolled down his window and hurled some abuses to those harassers. "madarchod larki nai dekhi kabi, peechay kar bike warna maa yeh doon ga". We had to turn left from ghora chowk towards cavalry bridge, and as fate would have it, the couple turned left too, and all 4 bikes aswell. Obviously they retaliated with their abuses too, and one of them punched my side mirror and broke it. I manoeuvred the car in such a way to be in between that couple and the other bikes, and braked hard. Not my brightest moment (number 1) at that time, and one bike crashed into us. The couple at that time vanished (good for them) because we slowed the goons down. The other bikes circled our car and demanded to stop, and me being an absolute stoned idiot, did stop infront of the bus stand right before cavalry chowk (not bright moment number 2). I exited my car and landed a straight punch on the guy who pulled the door handle, and i could visibly see blood coming from his cheek (not bright moment number 3). We found ourselves outnumbered, atleast 10 to 3, and other passer by bikers also joined, so in reality, it was something like 20 vs 3. One thing i kept care of was my car keys, (bright moment number 1), i dont know why but i had hoped of making an escape. Our shirt buttons were torn, chaperein, mukkay, thudday for a good 2 or 3 minutes or so, and with the help of some sensible uncles stopping their cars and coming to our rescue, we somehow managed to get back to our car. As i started it and tried to escape, someone broke the passerger side window, but i sped away. As i crossed the cavalry chowk, going towards cavalry bridge, we slowed down hoping that was the end of it and started counting our losses. We were wrong, as atleast 8-10 bikes passed us in an attempt to block us right at the top of cavalry bridge. It was a do or die moment at that point, and i sped up my car to ram into the blockade. I was doing atleast 90-100kph, and luckily the biker removed his bike infront of us (maybe he got scared or whatever), or he would have been a roadkill. There was no underpass at firdous market chowk at that time, and i broke the traffic signal at maybe 80kph. Not my brightest moment (number 4) and sped away towards kalma chowk. I didnt see any bike following us, maybe due to our high speed or them being stuck at the red light, and in one of my first true bright moments (number 2), i made a uturn and slowed down the car to seem like an average Joe. I could see bikes rushing down other side of the road towards kalma chowk, not knowing where we went. Turned left from firdous market chowk, went to mm alam, got some water bottles, and reflected on what had just happened. We were still in an adrenaline rush, and couldnt sit still, legs shaking uncontrollably. Torn shirts, bruised faces and what not, we thanked God there wasnt any serious or permanent injury that wouldnt heal.

My rear bumper was damaged, side mirror and passenger side window needed replacment. We waited out for atleast 1.5 hours to calm our nerves. But the beauty of that post-teen age was, all this still didnt stop us from calling back our dealer at firdous market and scoring a Ballentines 😂.

The next day was spent getting the car fixed in a beaten hungover state while missing my 8am's, so that my father wouldnt notice. He did find out due to a fixed dry dent almost a year later though.

If the guy who had his left cheek bloodied by someone driving a black honda in december 2014 is reading this, hope you had learnt your lesson and are doing well in life, and not harrassing women anymore.

I certainly have learnt my lesson, smoking up is injurious to health. 😂

Thankyou for taking the time to read.