Or, "where I've been and where I'm going".

I currently have a lover and a friends-with-benefits (who loves me too, but more on that later). Both of them have been with me for around a year. Both of them are Good Girls (not hos or freaks). The lover I met on the bus on the way to a very large gaming convention that took place in a neighboring city. I didn't have any tickets to the convention but I wasn't going to let a little thing like that stop me from seeing the cosplayers and maybe get some sarging in. She was wearing a pikachu hoodie and a Portal lanyard, so I naturally assumed she was also heading there. She wasn't planning to, but we went there anyways and saw the sights that were publicly available. We also accidentally got into the area that requires a badge because I didn't know where I was going and the person in charge of crowd control overlooked us. :D

The FWB, on the other hand, I met at the local college I attend. I originally talked with her twin sister, but there was no chemistry there. I spent time talking with both of them and clicked much better with the FWB.

My favorite part was when FWB's twin warned me not to try anything with FWB, because FWB made poor decisions and jumped headlong into things without thinking them through first.

Re-he-heeealy. >:D

I limit the amount of time I spend with each of them to once a week. Occasionally when I need emotional support (because I stupidly looked at my ex's Facebook page, for example) I'll contact Lover and maybe spend more time with her than I should, but it's a necessary evil.

Recently I had to Soft Next Lover for treating me poorly. It was her birthday and I guess she was treating me like a traditional BF, because she was telling (not asking) me what I would and would not do, complaining about my past behavior, etc.

I should have stopped her at the first sign of trouble, and Nexted her on the second, but it's been a while since I've been in a situation like that and I didn't realize what was happening until the third time this happened.

So I took her aside and told her I was going to leave. She didn't like this and tried defending her actions, so I cut her off and left, planning to cut off all contact with her for a week minimum.

A few days later she texted me because she wanted to pick up some stuff she left at my place. It seemed like a shit test, and I didn't have anything more important to do, so I agreed and let her pick up her stuff.

She arrived, she cried, I was unmoved, we snuggled, and I initiated sex. Some more snuggles, then she got her stuff and left.

The FWB has a tight schedule but always tells me if a day wouldn't work for her beforehand (NO FLAKING. That's very important, or I wouldn't have been with her as long as I have.) The last time she was over she misheard "does that feel good" as "I love you" and said "I love you too". I was confused and repeated myself, and it never came up again.

It doesn't change anything, of course. I use her for sex and snuggles, and she does the same. ;)

I think the major difference between the two is the Lover often spends the night or I spend the night at her place. The FWB, due to her tight schedule, has so far been unavailable to do either. Since she let slip that she loves me too, I can only assume that the difference exists more in my head that it does in theirs.

Unfortunately, these two women are the only ones I currently see. I live in a smallish city and have trouble finding women to approach, so it's difficult to replenish my pool. Once I graduate from college and get a job I'm going to move to the much larger city that's about 10 miles away and has a lot more people.

In the meantime, though, even though I only have these two women, I still Next as required. If I lost both of them tomorrow I would be unhappy (very unhappy), but I wouldn't let it deter me from doing what is necessary to handle the relationships, and my lifestyle, correctly.