Subject: Technique will NOT WORK unless you’re confident and outcome independent. Here’s how you develop both...
Author: Blackdragon

In response to a lot of questions I’ve been getting I almost made some new posts about what I do with online game and daygame, but I caught myself when I recalled a lot of posts, both current and old, I’ve seen by guys who have been around a long time, and are (usually) out in the field, but not getting a lot of results.

So I’m going to post this first...

Remember when you were in school? I don’t mean college. I mean when you were a kid. Maybe even high school at the oldest.

You had the smart kids, the dumb kids, and the kids in the middle.

I want to talk about the smart kids for a minute.

There were three kinds of smart kids in your class.

The first kind were the bored smart kids. They sat in the back of the class and didn’t give a shit. The teacher would lecture on and on, and they’d just stare out the window, wishing they were home reading a book or playing on their computer. They already knew it all…or at least they thought they did.

They didn’t do homework. They didn’t care. They did do well on tests often, since they were smart. But their report cards were horrible. When they get a C or a D on their report card, they didn’t care. They’d just toss it in the trash. School was bullshit anyway. They really didn’t give a shit. (I was one of those kids…I drove my mom nuts)

The second kind of smart kid was the “chill kid”. They considered school very important, and they did all of their homework, and got good grades. But they really didn’t have to study hard…they were smart.

They worked harder than the “bored smart kid”, because they actually wanted to get good grades. But other than that, they were pretty chill, pretty happy kids. They’d get their test back, there’d be an A on it, they’d shrug, and shove it in their backpack to show their parents when they got home, and just kept on talking to their friends.

The THIRD kind of smart kid…this is the kid I want to focus on. I clearly remember these guys…there were always one or two kids like this in my class. This is the smart kid who HAD TO GET IT RIGHT. This kid was smart, but unlike the other two kinds of smart kids, this kid was stressed out of his mind, all the time. He would pour over his homework like is life depended on it. He would work hours and hours on a single paper. Because he had to get it right.

Before every test, this kid would sweat bullets. Once the test began, he would go over every question over, and over, and over, and over again. He had to. He couldn’t get ONE QUESTION WRONG. Because he had to get it right. Everything right.

When grades were passed out for homework, or tests, or report cards (it didn’t matter), this kid would have his hands pressed to his head in sheer terror. When he got his test back, if it had an A on it, he would sigh with relief. Then he’d talk about his fucking A all day, until his friends got tired of hearing about it. And wanted to kill him. Literally.

BUT…if the grade was anything less than an A , his life was at an end. If he got an A- or, god forbid, a B , this kid would FREAK. He face would turn red. He would argue with the teacher. He would bitch and scream. He’d be furious. Sometimes, he’d even cry, right there in the middle of class. Because he had to get it right.

So where am I going with all of this?

I have said before that if you are:

1. Confident, and

2. Don’t give a shit

...your technique can be POOR, and you will still get laid.

Whereas, if you are:

1. Inwardly nervous or feel unworthy, and/or

2. Really, really give a shit

...even if your technique is PERFECT, the only time you will get laid is if you are really lucky, or if she’s really drunk.

There’s a lot of talk about “inner game”. But “inner game” doesn’t mean anything. “Inner game” means you are confident, and you don’t give a shit. At least that’s what it means to me.

If you’re out trying to learn how to pick up chicks, trying various techniques, but you are not confident, or you really give a shit, you are that “stressed smart kid” in your class. You are working your ASS OFF for very little results, because you are trying to “get it right”.

Whereas the masterminds are the “chill smart kids”. They waltz into a situation, pick up the chick, work a little magic, and get laid. They DO work, but they don’t work HARD. They aren’t stressed. They are confident and outcome independent. They get results.

(The “bored smart kids” are the KJ’s [Keyboard Jockeys] on this board, who think they know everything but constantly get D’s on their report cards…i.e. they don’t get laid…or at least don’t get laid beyond one ball-busting GF at a time)

Technique is critical. I use a lot of technique. Yes, you should be out practicing technique. But you must master CONFIDENCE and OUTCOME INDEPENDENCE before your technique will do ANYTHING OF VALUE FOR YOU.

OK, enough of this philosophical shit. Let’s get practical.

How do you develop confidence and outcome independence? You can’t just tell someone “be confident” or “just don’t care what she says!” Clearly that won’t work.

So you have to ACT confident and outcome independent. Keep acting this way, and you will eventually FEEL this way. NLP at it’s most basic form.

So how exactly do you do THAT?

Here’s how:

1. Learn exactly what confidence and outcome independence looks like.

A. For confidence, study any James Bond movie, any old Arnold Schwarzenegger action movie, and study men in movies like Morgan Freeman, Ed Harris, and Sean Connery (there are many other good examples of confident men in movies and on TV…choose as you like).

B. For outcome independence, study guys in movies like Jim Carrey, Kevin Kline, and especially James Woods, the absolute KING of outcome independence. The two best movies to study James Woods, to learn what true OI looks like: “The Specialist” and “Cop”.

In “Cop”, he’s doing shit like murdering suspects, telling his boss to go fuck himself, having S&M sex with witnesses, it’s insane. And beautiful. And it has one of the best endings in Hollywood history, ever.

In “The Specialist”, the movie itself isn’t that great, but it’s fascinating to watch the contrast between confidence and outcome independence. If you do watch it, notice the clear difference between the confident, AMOG-type villain (played by Eric Roberts) and “don’t give a shit” villain, played by Woods. It’s great.

Quick side note: There is one guy that even beats James Woods if you want to do a little digging. The BBC science fiction television series Dr. Who, back in the 1970’s, had the main character played by a man named Tom Baker. If you want to see outcome independence, this guy was fucking AMAZING. Rent or buy some DVD’s (they are currently published still), try to ignore the terrible 1970’s special effects, and watch this guy. This guy DID NOT GIVE A SHIT. He was a GENIUS. If James Woods is the outcome independence king, Tom Baker was the outcome independence GOD. (The current, modern Doctor Who, David Tennant, is also very good).

C. Walk around your house, in front of the mirror, and in front of friends, emulating how these men move, walk, and talk. Literally practice this. Do it over and over again. Back in the day, when I felt myself drifting, I would sometimes channel James Bond, Arnold, James Woods, or Tom Baker when I was with a chick (nowadays it’s pretty much automatic).

2. Once you think you’ve got these mannerisms down, pick out your ugliest female friend and take her out on a fake date. If you want, explain what you’re trying to do. DON’T try to fuck her. You want outcome independence! You don’t care what happens!!!

On the “date” pick out your favorite example for confidence and your favorite example for outcome independence and ACT LIKE HIM ALL NIGHT WITH HER. I don’t care if you are nervous as hell inside. ACT THE PART. If you want to practice running game technique on her also, go ahead, but focus on being confident and not giving a shit.

Hey, if you end up actually fucking your ugly female friend, great, but that’s not the objective here. Your objective to practice acting confident and outcome independent.

3. Control your body language. Whenever you walk, imagine a string attached to the top of your head, pulling you upward like a puppet. This will force you to walk very differently.

When sitting, lean BACK, and completely relax. Don’t slouch, that’s leaning forward. Lean BACK. Don’t lean forward like you’re interested, and don’t sit up ramrod straight like you’ve spent 10 years in the marines. Lean BACK. Chill. Act like you actually are the owner of wherever you are…the bar, club, mall, wherever (I always do).

4. Do it again. Take another one of your female friends “out”. Practice your acting. Rinse and repeat.

5. On every sarge, every day2, every outing, practice your acting. Act it. Over and over again.

The damnest thing will start to happen. You’ll actually start to feel confident and less worried about “getting it right”.

And you know what?

All of your technique you’ve been trying will actually start to WORK.

-Blackdragon

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