Link: https://impulsetherapy.com/what-is-an-ocd-backdoor-spike-how-to-deal-with-it/

From the article:

“Well, an OCD backdoor spike, also known as denial OCD, is one of the most harmful manifestations of OCD. This phenomenon occurs when an OCD sufferer starts to experience less stress and anxiety, and as a result, fewer intrusive thoughts, fears, mental images, doubts, etc., and then begins to “obsess” because he or she is not stressed and anxious enough about the original intrusive thoughts (original obsession). When this occurs, the OCD sufferer takes this as “evidence” that he or she has been in denial all of this time.

For instance, an OCD sufferer may reason the following, “If I am not tormented by these thoughts, fears, etc., I do not really have OCD or these thoughts, just a part of my personality and mean nothing or an indication that I am a just a depraved person.” An OCD sufferer, who has been free of OCD symptoms\ for weeks, months, days, or even years, may experience an OCD backdoor spike when intrusive thoughts, doubts, and fears arise again.

Or, he or she may experience worry that it could come back – once free of it. OCD backdoor spikes occur when an OCD sufferer worries about or “obsesses” over why he or she is no longer worried about or “obsessing” over this or that. An OCD backdoor spike can also be deceptive. It could also cause an OCD sufferer to believe that the distressing thoughts, fears, and doubts are “signs” of impending danger and therefore, valid and reasonable – when that is probably not the truth.

This could convince him or her that he or she never had OCD in the first place. In reality, those thoughts, fears, doubts, etc., are “signs” of an OCD flare. Lastly, an OCD backdoor spike could OCD sufferer to feel shame and guilt for having the condition, and convince him or her that he or she does not deserve to feel better or be free of OCD. The truth is OCD backdoor spikes are challenging to treat, although they are “treatable.” Keep in mind, however, that an OCD backdoor spike could cause an OCD sufferer to battle these intrusive thoughts, worries, and doubts for weeks, months, or even years. It could also cause him or her to question his or her sanity – i.e., “Am I crazy for feeling this way and thinking these thoughts?” “Why can’t I just be happy that I do not feel stress and anxiety when I have upsetting thoughts, fears, or doubts?” “What is wrong with me?” Ultimately, a backdoor spike is just another manifestation of OCD.

In summary, an OCD backdoor spike is a response to an OCD sufferer’s recovery and success. People, who are effectively controlling their OCD symptoms, are the most susceptible to experiencing this type of spike. These individuals, who have little-to-no problems with their OCD, may experience a sudden jolt of stress and anxiety that appears to come out of nowhere. It is called an OCD backdoor spike because it occurs suddenly or appears to “sneak” through the backdoor. In other words, you do not know it is coming.

It is like your OCD says, “Hi! Remember me. You thought I was gone? Oh no, I’m still here and my purpose is to make you doubt yourself, excessively worry, and trigger or worsen your stress and anxiety. I want to make you question if you have OCD, if your OCD is going to return, or if you are just a terrible person – not an OCD sufferer. My goal is to make sure you doubt everything you believed about your OCD diagnosis.”