I only got about a week and a half of sanity this month. Here I am, back in my emotional storm. I am so frustrated at just being alive today. Everyday I wake up and go to work is a miracle in itself and I'm losing the battle more and more each day. I yelled at my boyfriend for basically nothing and I just want to hide under a rock and cut myself until I bleed out. Everytime I get into luteal I forget why am i even trying at life again??? I only ever have just enough energy to act like a sane person at work and even then I'm barely holding on by a thread and I know it's going to eventually catch up to me and my performance will suffer and everyone will know I'm a crazy person half of the month and I'll lose my job and everything I've worked for which feels like it means nothing anyway. Even if I'm happy it never lasts long enough so might as well just give up and KMS.