https://preview.redd.it/49h4n5ap9tnd1.jpg?width=702&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b1be08c9e0a50205445b60485319c58ec73798be

We've only ever done Feeld and the clubs and we're ready to move on from both now.

We've been going to the clubs since 2018 and swinging has always been a side hobby of ours. It's not our lifestyle, it's not something we have time for outside of preparation for the club and actually going to it. Clubs have been perfect for us but over the years they have changed so much that there isn't much diversity and what we're interested in just isn't there anymore.

We're early 40's, fit, attractive, DDF, DTF, professionals with not a lot of time to play the tag game online but we're realizing that to find couples that we are interested in, it's time we put more work into it.

TVR surprises us that it keeps getting better but we've come to accept that it will likely never be for us. Privata was always our go-to but in our last hoorah this past weekend there were only, maybe, five couples that were both fit AND that we actually found attractive - just finding couples where both weren't overweight was difficult. At one point the dance floor was packed with 40-50 couples and there were only two couples that weren't both overweight. That's fine and all but that's not our thing. The regular cliques there have also become a distraction, it's the same annoying 20 couples almost every weekend running around being obnoxious like it's high school all over again, it's such a strange flex in life. Sanctuary is such hit-miss that we don't even feel like it's a swinger club, and it probably isn't anymore. Friendly people and staff but I don't think we've ever gone and found partners there.

Onto the sites. This is likely all dated but from what we recall:

* Swinglifestyle was full of 50 year old couples and mostly bbws and had a horrible site that was always crashing.

* Kasidie was mostly 30 somethings.

* Quiver was just getting started and was all the same couples from kasidie.

* Fetlife was heavy bdsm and kink and users got mad if you called it a swinger site. Also lots of single guys. We did a free trial (?) and I just remember trying to navigate there without getting turned off and then our inbox and friend requests being too many single men to bother with continuing. Maybe that's changed??

* adult friend finder was meth, single men, and had a lot of ads and spam.

* SDC hadn't started yet but we're seeing it advertised.

* Lifestyle Lounge was the over 55 and older crowd

* voodoo was a joke. Not sure if that's still around or not.

Is any of this still true?

If you were like us, didn't have a lot of time to invest, and you didn't care about costs, where would you go?