So I know a lot of people are going to want to utilize this new upcoming year as a way to start fresh. After usually a long hard and depressing winter, the new year looks like a light at the end of the tunnel where "this is when I get clean". I've been there. I know what it feels like to get everything in line and make sure you're "prepped" to get clean. This usually means getting all of the partying and reckless behavior out of your system before you make your change. You make plans to cut down, or change towns, drop bad influences, and load up on Immodium and WD remedies.

Well I just want to prepare you a bit and offer MY advice if you're in this position, looking for 2016 to be a year of new starts.

If you've been addicted to opiates for one or more years, even on and off, getting clean is one of the most difficult things you can accomplish. I'm sure you're aware how hard it is, and I'm sure you're aware at how frightening it is. But sometimes, people don't grasp this concept. Meaning some think "this is when I get clean". This is simply not the case. You're never clean. You're an addict, and if you're one of those who don't like that term...well then you're a junkie. In order to not be a junkie, you're going to need to make MAJOR changes in EVERY aspect in your life. Every single routine you've grown accustomed to needs to change. It's just the way the addict is wired. And in order to really break the chains and get off your DOC, or in the context of this sub, opiates, you are going to need major help. Sure some can run off into a hole somewhere, kick for a few months, pop out, and never touch the stuff again. But those people usually aren't you. Face it, if it was you, you'd be able to "have just one".

The first thing you should do is get help. Detox center, Rehab, Therapy, NA/AA meetings, the whole fucking nine. You're not going to be able to do this yourself, again, or else you would've done it. This is because you have life to deal with while you "get clean". There are things that are going to come up that you're going to have to deal with, while you're all clammy, haven't eaten in days, shitting yourself, with a crippling depresion . Life doesn't give a shit about you "getting clean", it's very unforgiving. Responsibilities don't just go away once you decide dope isn't for you anymore. And this is something a lot of people seem to forget when they want to get sober. These responsibilities pile up and are sometimes too overwhelming to some, so they say fuck it and head back to their opiates. It's too much for a single person to deal with. It has sure happened to me, time and time again. This is why getting help is much needed. When you have people who are SPECIFICALLY there to support you and guide you through this process, it makes dealing with the issues in your life more of a focus for you. This in turn makes it an easier transition into this brand new life you're going to need to live.

Do not be afraid of getting help. There's nothing you can say, there's no story you can tell, that these professionals and ex-junkies haven't already heard and or lived. This gives you someone to relate to and more importantly will give you someone to listen to. Listening for a junkie is vital in recovery, because for all these years of running, the only thing a junkie has been doing is not listening. Let these people in and let them really get to know you so hopefully any issues you may be hoarding below will be exposed to you and you can work on them. Do not take this communication for granted.

Now if you're one who can't go to a detox or a rehab because of insurance or finances, there are other options. You can go to a hospital and have them point you in ways that will work for you. But you need to do something. And again, I've been in your exact spot only 4 years ago. I remember having that feeling where I said "This year I'll hole up in my room, take a couple subs my friend got me, and ride it out for a few weeks, and then I'll never pick up again". I didn't realize how hard life hits you when the drugs wear off, the fog clears, and all you're left with is your piling debt, the lies you've told, and a bad case of insomnia and the runs. Getting help was the only thing that worked, because it showed me how "getting clean" was a fallacy, and there was only staying clean. Staying clean one day at a time. And in order to stay clean, your life needs to completely change.

I, myself have been clean for 4 years, but still to this day deal with cravings, anxiety, and the occasional "fuck it". Anyone who has been clean will say the same. But fortunately, I was able to learn the skills and coping mechanisms that keep me sober today. It was a new year when I took that time I spent in rehab, hospitals, and in the rooms, very seriously and I'm very thankful for that. Because like I said, before that, trying to get it done myself was not cutting it. So hopefully this little blurb will help someone out that was in the same position I was back then. I wish I'd known this stuff the first time I tried to "get clean", so I figured I share my words. Just remember, someone has been in your exact position, with the exact thoughts, and the exact problems, but is now living a healthy and productive life. Take this new year and make a change, and the kind of change you can live by. <3