This may sound like a weird question, but are there really subtle clues or signals (not necessarily consciously,) that people give off that let others know their sexuality? I used to hear people joke about "gay-dar" and things like that, and I suppose it makes some sense, but then why don't I have it?

I guess I can recognize the stereotypical signs that you see in the media (I'm 43, so there's been more bad than good in my time, unfortunately.) I just evidently don't have that perceptiveness.

This question arose from a recent experience in a lifestyle type club. My wife and I brought a bisexual guy to a club with us, and he pointed out guys that he believed were also bi. This club isn't the type with playrooms per se, but people do take off their clothes, make out, and sometimes have sex in the club, but I've never seen any overt male/male contact. As the evening went on, we were in a small group making out - and our date told us later that one of the guys that he pointed out earlier was rubbing our date's crotch.

Is this a skill that I don't have because I've only been open to male/male contact for a short time? Or is it just me not being very observant?

Thoughts?