Our experience with some complaints. We've been at this for a few months, I actually got lucky. We were already playing in some other kink lifestyles (Master/Slave, Dom/Sub, etc.) and the wife asked me to tell her all my kinks and she would do her best to fulfill my fantasies. So I told her about this lifestyle and while hesitant at first, she stayed true to her word.

We started watching more hotwife porn, more MFM and she was also interested in the Bi side of playing for both of us. MMF and FFM as well as FMF. So we began our search. I searched Men for her, for us and she searched for Women for me, for us.

We've found other couples that have been easy to get to know and even some single women. When it comes to the men though... JFC!!!! It's been a hell of a journey. So far those have been strikeouts. It seems like a lot of the guys we run into, think they are too good for "vibe checks" and verification.

We do this to make sure that we aren't hooking up with some psycho or extremely clingy person, as well to make sure that what they are searching for and what we are searching for, matches up.

We've had guys back out after the first question, which is usually "What about us did you find attractive that had you message us?" We actually had a guy say "I'm not about playing 'Truth or Consequences', either you want to hook up or you don't." We had another guy that I had set up to start exchanging flirty messages with the wife, I told him that she was new back on the dating scene and let her get her bearings back while flirting with someone new. He exchanged a couple of flirts and then ghosted the wife, saying that he wasn't interested in flirting (fine) and just to hit him up when we wanted to hook up.

We have steered clear from a lot of these guys. These are just a couple of examples. A lot of guys say they know this lifestyle and understand it, but when it comes time to put the work in, they think they are too good. We let them know it's not going to work for us and good luck to them. We've actually started blocking guys when it comes to them acting that way, since we aren't going to be on the 'hook' side of the line, if you know what I mean.

We haven't given up yet though and thanks to this Subreddit, as well as a few podcasts, we've learned that this part of the lifestyle can be difficult. We've decided to change up our approach and started seeing what we can find in the 'wild'. She'll go to the gym and we'll be on Discord. She'll stream to me from her phone, while she has me on an earbud, the whole time and I'll let her know if guys are checking her out, if there are guys approaching. So far a potential guy that fits the description of what we are looking for has approached her and introduced himself at the gym. We'll keep traveling that avenue and see how it works out for us.

Even if it doesn't, as frustrating as this part of the lifestyle has gotten, we are having fun on the adventure together. This is about both us, this is our focus. So as long as both of us are still having fun, we'll continue, but the moment one of us say's "I think I've had enough/I want a break", we'll call it quits.

Does your experience compare, at all, when it comes to the guys? I know we didn't start off asking for advice, but if anyone has any input, that would be appreciated. ~ Phoenix and Rowena