My wife and I are both bi. (M36) (F35) been happily married for 12 years. Currently she has a girlfriend, cool girl and sometimes we all go on vacation together, and have a little fun. They have a date night once a week and it’s working out.

I have a few male FWBs some have been ongoing for years, I am super picky and petrified of STDs so I don’t do randos.

Recently I have been talking to a few ladies and had a few dates. I feel for you ladies it’s a jungle out there, and be careful. I’ve actually talked a few women into not doing an open marriage, because it was the husband’s fantasy and she didn’t really want to do it, which is okay to say no. Get some toys and get your wife off if you’re a one minute man, or get the PE spray.

If you want a successful open marriage don’t model your goals after Pornhub vids, i.e. if you love your husband you’re not gonna get a good outcome making him a cuck or humiliation. I just had a conversation with a woman that did that, and “the bull” moved in ran up her credit cards and they had to get the police involved, restraining orders etc. I have heard other stories where the 2nd guy tries to take over and push your husband out of the picture completely. This is why it is key to establish boundaries and agree on them and don’t use them against each other down the road, there will be a give and take.

Ladies keep it separate until you can trust the partner and really see if they are 1. Stable 2. Aren’t trying to fuck you financially more than sexually. 3. Have something to lose on their end. 4. Abs and a big dick doesn’t mean they have a job. You want someone that is stable and you trust to fulfill whatever needs you have.

Guys if you’re gonna go for other guys, trans, CDs, etc. Wrap it up, and be careful, there are a ton of AI apps that make people look a lot better than they are. Meet them in a public place that you can leave safely and quickly. No hotel room meets the first time, have a beer and talk.

I’m not trying to meet people on Reddit but happy to chat and give my opinion on your situation. I won’t judge because I’ve probably made all the same mistakes you’re fearing or have made.