It was just before covid, I had an amazing irl affair with someone local. She was also married and we had a really nice six month relationship. She and her husband ended up being relocated to FL, and that was that.

I stayed sad and depressed for a while, but it was disguised as just being sad at the state of the world. I didn’t have anyone to share my grief with. It was really difficult and I swore off any kind of extra marital adventure forever.

That decision lasted about three months. I thought maybe I’d give OA a try. Found someone really compatible and we hit it off almost instantly.

Months passed, then two years. we used the L word with each other and planned on meeting in the spring of 2023. Things were really going well..

Or so I thought.

It turns out she was having OA’s with a few other people at the same time. Fuck… I don’t know why, but that stung really bad. Thought we had a genuine connection and I saw no signs of any issue. Yeah, it sucked and, it’s honestly a bit embarrassing to admit that it happened. But, lesson learned.

Still, I believe there’s a chance of lightning striking again. And here I am, trying again.

About me:

51 years ago, I showed up here. I couldn’t really speak or even feed myself. I was dependent on my parents for not only food, but they also had to change my shitty diapers and keep me clothed and warm. I was just so fucking needy. Definitely not what you’d consider a top tier AP at that time.

Anyhow, I outgrew that after a few decades. Learned to be a successful member of society. Trying to be a decent human and live my best life. My twenties flew by.

Met my wife in my mid 30’s, and we were married by 2010. Then, I blinked my fucking eyes, and I was in my mid forties.. a dad and all these responsibilities were increasing at what felt like an exponential pace. Still fun and exciting, but full of grown up stuff. I love my wife and do not want to change anyone’s situation.

Things with my wife have were really good too. Except for in the bedroom, where I began to find myself becoming very sexually frustrated. Began to crave and desire more.. new, different, kinky. All the things.

It wasn’t anything to do with my wife at all. We were/are still intimate and there’s a definite need to stay connected in that way. But that fire hot sex that happened when we were first dating.. long since burned out. That’s kinda what brought me to the NSFW side of reddit.

Physically, I’m tall and thin. Think swimmer build. I’m like a 51 year old in a 35 year old body. Cardio 4 times a week. I exercise mostly for longevity rather than vanity. But it’s had so many benefits honestly.

I’m a cool, dorky dad with gray hair and hazel eyes. Very dark and dry sense of humor. Love all genres of music and occasionally read a book. I’m interesting and authentic, which hopefully sets me apart from the other posts here.

Mostly what I want to get across, is that I’m a real mutha fucka. Like an actual human.. when I’m cut, I bleed. It would be so very lovely to find someone similar. What I’m seeking:

I’m looking for a long term relationship with a woman over 40. Someone also married and with children preferably. Also, I’d prefer she still love and appreciate her husband. It’s not a deal breaker , but I don’t know that I’ll have a lot in common with those who are in completely unhappy marriages.

I like to chat daily, and later at night most nights. Definitely not looking for a work hours only thing.

Also not opposed to a real life situation once a level of trust and connection are established.

I’m not the best at writing these things obviously.. but if you made it all the way to the end and understand what I’m looking for; thank you. I would love to hear from you if anything resonated.

Thank you again for taking the time to read this.

Edit: I had no idea I’d get this many responses. Out of every post I’ve ever made here, I think I’ve gotten a total of 5 replies. Until now. This makes me feel seen. 🙏