I’m kind of exhausted by posting ads, but still somehow hopeful? Blame the hopeless romantic in me I guess. Posting from my OG account in the hopes that maybe, just maybe, this will be how I find a real someone again.

What i’m looking for hmm? A gentleman, who knows when not to be. You know, opens doors but also smacks my ass on the way through. Hugs me tight & doesn’t let go, but will also put his hand around my neck while he kisses me with my back against the wall. Right, you get it. I apparently have a weakness for men who are a little boujee (maybe you make your own pasta, maybe you constantly hunt for the best coffee shop, sushi, or boba in your town, maybe you do photography & have a bunch of lenses you have your eyes on) but also for men who are down to earth & can bullshit about normal people things. A man who doesn’t think buying flowers for his lady is stupid or a waste of money. A man who believes kindness is easy, and chooses to be kind not based on what he could get in return for it.

Not looking for cake eaters. Not looking for online only. Not looking for sexting or nudes (if we have a connection those types of things will come). Not looking for people who have crappy opsec & choose to pull the delete & disappear.

What you will get: someone who will know you so well that you could ask me about something 2 years from now & i will have it tucked into my notes about you (from your brother’s wedding anniversary to what cologne you prefer to what number you wore on your high school soccer team). someone who will text you to tell you they miss you even when i know you’re busy just so you see it when you check your messages. someone who will send you stupid selfies, memes, tiktoks, & music links. someone who will probably tell you about the book she’s reading as though you have any idea what i’m talking about even though you probably won’t. someone who will hold you up on the bad days, cheer for you on the good ones, and sit with you for everything in between.

I’m a mom of one little princess, a preschool teacher at a daycare, a book whore, a renaissance faire nerd, unironically names Dashboard Confessional as her favorite band, goes to bed at probably what most people would consider to be a ridiculous old lady time (but will probably lose sleep sometimes just to talk to you for even 5 more minutes), who crochets stupid plush things for her best friends, whose life is undoubtedly run by her 2 dogs, 2 cats, & kindergartener.

If any of this STUPIDLY LONG ad hit a mark with you, send me a chat request. Maybe we hit it off & end up on telegram or in each others arms or whatever.