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I'm in the market for a mini expedited affair. You know how most affairs drag on for weeks or even months, with an ending you can see coming a mile away? Well, I’ve got the weekend to myself, and I want to cram that whole emotional rollercoaster—complete with its thrilling highs and dramatic lows—into just a couple of days. Let's make it happen!
Here's the rough schedule (feel free to take breaks as needed):
Hour 1: Meet and greet. Pleasant exchanges, feeling the vibe.
Hour 2: Pic exchange and early flirting. We’ll dance around the subject of sex like it's a poorly choreographed tango.
Hour 3: The subject of sex has been breached. We're now comfortable using all the 3/4/5 letter words. Let's just say, Scrabble is about to get interesting!
Hour 4: First sex. Fireworks? Maybe.
Hour 5: Doubts creep in. You ask - Is this taking too much time and energy with no future?
Hour 6: We sort this out. First make-up sex. It's like magic.
Hour 7: Now I have doubts. Is this going anywhere?
Hour 8: We sort this out. Another round of make-up sex. More magic.
Hour 9: More fights and arguments. Sex takes a backseat.
Hour 10: One of us goes on a vacation.
Hour 11: A milder "it's been a while" kind of sex.
Hour 12 - Hour 15: The slow death into breakup. Cue dramatic music.
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