Well, I hope this doesn't get pulled down. Because I am looking for company just like everyone else here. I'm just looking for something a bit different...

I'd like to find a playmate. I'm open to different shapes and body sizes, but age needs not be crazy young. No, I don't catch Pokémon and no I don't watch anime. Mrs. Robinson doesn't live here. Also if you think any woman is Mrs. Robinson, you've self eliminated.

Anyhow the playmate thing. The type of engagement I need is infrequent but intense. I have role plays I like to act out on and would like a partner in that. But I'm not long written belonging on the dirtypenpals sub. I'm an in-betweener.

You are a dominant leaning switch. Don't play along just to please me; to thine own self be true. It will work much better for both of us and the Os will be so much more satisfying if you're unapologetically you and I'm me. This is the most important paragraph in here. Read it again to make sure you identify, please.

Now the part that will make me sound like a heartless monster: I don't want to mind meld to you and burn with the fire of a thousand suns. I don't want your daily schedule and to follow you online. I don't want to hear about your marital problems. But, if you need to talk, I will listen. I would enjoy it if we stayed Reddit friends when this has run its course. I will care about you.

So I prefer a partner who is generally happy but bored. A man with a missing tooth, if you will. He's hunky dory but there are times he can't help but run the tip of his tongue over that damn hole. Something's. Just. Missing, and it's an intermittent fiddle. Maybe it keeps him up at night, prodding that empty place inside. Maybe the best cure for it sometimes is to fuck a stranger online; who are we to judge? Shut up and show me your D already.

If you're on at USA night times, that'd be great. Work rn makes it almost impossible for me to play during the day. Maybe you're a cute dude in an exotic land and have an accent that adds 10 points. I am ready to vomit regarding politics so let's not go there. Be fast, and weird, and sexual in a way where you would eat Da Bomb hotsauce for pussy. Wear a uniform? I'm wet already. FAFO?