What’s the worst way to start this off? I mean, how can I start at the bottom and work my way up? I think too many guys start with the good stuff, dance around the shitty parts, and kinda just blend in? Obviously, I’m married and not looking to change anyone’s relationship status, only looking to enhance both our lives.

Let’s give this a shot: 1. I’m bald. Not like cue ball bald, but bald on top. I keep it shaved short. I don’t get the big deal around this one. It’s nothing I can control, or would want to. I like how I look! And do you realize how much money I save on hair care products and styling?!?

1. I’ve done this enough to know when we’re not vibing and I’ll let you know. I think it’s better to be honest and clear than to drag things along and ghost. People sometimes mistake my honesty for callousness, but that’s not it. I want to be on the same page and do my best to be gracious.

2. I don’t really hike much anymore. I’ve done some pretty spectacular trips, sure, but with a kid and work, who’s got the time?!? Also, how many people on here are ACTUALLY hiking??

3.5. I have a beard. I only gave it half a point because for some, it’s an immediate no-no, others are into it. I keep it trimmed and neat, no ZZ Top here.

Okay, enough being a whiny bitch (and do feel free to call me one if I get whiny again), let’s throw out some good things:

1. I stay in shape. I work out regularly and actually enjoy it. Happy to show off the fruits of my labor. It’d be great if you stayed in shape too, but not afraid of mom-bods!!

2. I love sharing pics, video and voice calls. I want to be a part of your day and have you be a part of mine!

3. I’m funny, dammit. Totally understand d how the start of this post did NOT give that impression, but I really enjoy making people laugh.

4. I’m curious. I love learning random shit. Both about people I’m chatting with and the world around me! I can talk movies (for way too long), history, science and tons of other junk.

5. I’m available. I’m around days and evenings, weekends too! I think that’s an underrated selling point. I’m in CST and much more of an early-bird than a night owl.

So, what are you thinking? What’d I miss?