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41 [M4F] #NYC - Getting self esteem from online affairs is bad.
Author Summary
YourAccidental is a male age 41 looking for a female in New York City
Post Body

In general, measuring your self-worth based on who wants to be intimate with you is a losing proposition - online or offline. The basic premise causes hyper-focus on your own insecurities, and no other person - no amount of other people - will ever make you feel really good about yourself. The reddit model feeds our constant craving for external validation, and keeps us addicted. But we will always want more. It's bad.

But maybe, sometimes, it's a little bit good? Like, what if you're comfortable with yourself and your own flaws, happy where you are, and enjoying your comfort zone? Do you just, like, stay there in your comfort one forever? It's good to have some aspirations after all.

In its best form, a new encounter can be like a kind of magician's trick. In our effort to attract a partner we put forward an aspirational version of ourselves: what we wish we were. As we form a relationship, we start to live up to the aspiration, and presto-change-o we are the aspiration.

Well, it all comes crashing back down to earth eventually. But maybe some of it sticks.

Anyhow, I like blank verse poetry and playing the piano. I'm extremely vain so I will send you unsolicited face pics all the time. The Republican party is the worst. I like to compliment you on your outfit. What am I looking for? A pleasant surprise.

I have meetings all day today so this is kind of a bad time to post, but frankly, I love getting a ping from you while I'm in a meeting, and thinking about how we can sneak some time together when it's over.

Author
Account Strength
50%
Account Age
11 months
Verified Email
Yes
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No
Total Karma
134
Link Karma
89
Comment Karma
45
Profile updated: 3 days ago
Posts updated: 7 hours ago

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Post Details

Location
They Are
a male
Age
41
Looking For
a female
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Posted
7 months ago