So that’s it done for another year, the tinsel is down, the hangover from NYE is vanquished to the past. The tv adverts of December broadly urging you to “treat yourself it’s Christmas you deserve it” have been replaced with tight, sweat glazed bodies inferring “you’ve over indulged you mess, move your arse”.

Normality has been restored and that’s what I want to change. To clear the cliches we often see on this platform, home is not unhappy, I am not here to spouse bash and I certainly don’t wish to hear it from you. Home is a little devoid of communication, even more so affection and the urge for excitement and anticipation is heightened.

I keep quirky hours, I am in bed early and up even earlier - I am a slave to the service that pays my wages. Plus my dogs like being walked and are always happy to have breakfast early and they’re creatures of habit so I am too!

I have a lot of time on my hands, I want to find someone to share the good morning and good night messages with, learning about you, hearing what thrills you or just learning how much you want make a voodoo doll of Sandra in accounts because she is such a miserable jobsworth.

I am pragmatic, I am not anticipating feelings but I am not scared of that prospect. I am not expecting we will ever meet but if the geography and feeling is right, I don’t rule it out. Someone who reads this part and doesn’t panic, you might be who I want to connect with.

A little about me, I guess this bit will help you decide whether I am your kind of person, or not. I am thoughtful, considered and keep up to speed with current affairs. I have an opinion but I am not opinionated. Many in my life seek my opinion and advice, I think I try to place myself in your shoes, share my experience but respect it’s not my life or decision to make.

I think friends would describe me as funny, caring and dark humoured. Men in the pub would describe me as a footballing encyclopaedia and my dogs would tell you that I open the door the best based on their reaction when I get home.

As you’ve gleaned, sport is a passion, as is data. I love to workout - I weight train. I am the silent guy who uses weights he can lift and use without sounding like he’s birthing a pineapple as well as place them down without making it sound like an elephant has spontaneously collapsed. What is it with those people? If you can’t put it down, don’t pick it up!

I sporadically will be drawn into crime shows, comedy and shows about homes abroad. I love sunshine. I enjoy cycling - it clears and resets my mind.

I am very tall, my head is shaved, I have green eyes framed with glasses. I have a short beard and a hairy chest - I feel it’s important to mention as it’s a crowd splitter. I am on the cusp of looking athletic, I am absolutely not a gym rat but I think I am not a dad bod either, not just because I don’t have kids! My hands are huge, my fingers are thick, dexterous and probing (they know what they’re doing too, a good fingering is an underrated art form), my thighs are well defined (cycle a lot), I think I am reasonably well endowed (loathed to say ‘well hung’ as it sounds like praise you’d hear after an execution).

It would be nice if you shared an interest or two and I appreciate anyone who looks to improve themselves or take care of themselves. However, physical or psychological we all have our scars and imperfections so we should own them and wear them without fear.

18 , it should go without saying. I guess similar age would mean we would understand some references but the person is more important than the year you were born.

I will wrap this up now as I am in danger of submitting a dossier than an ad! If you choose to say hello, I know the replies will be in short supply as there is a lot of male competition, please give me more than a hello and an enquiry to the quality of my day/ mood. I have time on my hands and ample ability to message so give me a little to work with. A little effort can go a long way; we know that because that is why we are here to begin with.

Speak soon, maybe?