Looking for conversation.

I still talk occasionally to someone I met on here, with whom things got pretty intense. I started to get real feelings for her, and thought she had them for me, too. I never expected to fall for someone on here like this.

Then something changed, seemingly overnight. I started getting one word responses. No more audio or video calls. No more pictures (of any kind) in our chats. Reassurances that I didn't do anything wrong. She was just "busy".

Eventually, it came out that she needed something more physical. Like in person. Being on opposite sides of the country, that wasn't going to happen for us. And anything we did was a reminder of what she really wanted and wasn't getting. I thanked her for her honesty. We've been friendly since, but less frequent conversations, which I have to initiate.

Recently, she told me that she found someone. And it's helped make her really happy. I'm legitimately happy for her, since she sounds like she found what she's been looking for, and is in a really good place. But it doesn't stop me from still feeling hurt and getting stuck wondering about things that have been intrusive thoughts for months:

Did she actually have feelings for me? It felt like she did, but they seemed to vanish so suddenly. If she did, how did it change so fast? Was she ever really attracted to me? Again, it sure felt like she was, but out of nowhere, the attraction was gone... On her end. Does she actually want me around anymore? She's been very pleasant to talk to lately, but doesn't seek out conversations with me, and doesn't seem interested in talking about anything we used to talk about.

I'm not going to ask her these things for a few reasons. First, I'm happy things are going well for her, so there's no need to bring up the past. And she doesn't owe me an explanation. I also don't need to make it about me. And, probably the biggest thing: I don't think I want to know the answers. It'll just reopen the wounds and make me feel worse.

I'm interested to talk to people with similar experiences, and hear what you think about all this. I know this sub is full of people like that! I wouldn't mind your thoughts if you were on the other end of this either. Just be nice.

I hope we all find someone that makes us feel happy and fulfilled. Thanks for reading if you made it this far.

..."sir this is a Subway..."