Perhaps you’v seen my posts before. Unfortunately, I just can’t seem to find what I’m looking for..

I keep coming back to this deep, unyielding desire that I just can't seem to escape. It's a longing so profound, so consuming, that I find myself constantly drawn back to it, despite my best efforts to resist. This desire is my secret, something I must hide from the world, burying it deep within me. It's a yearning that defies logic, a craving that defies reason. Yet, no matter how hard I try to ignore it, it lingers, always there, always pulling me back. It's a part of me, a shadow that follows me wherever I go, reminding me of the passion that burns within, waiting to be unleashed.

So let’s cut to the chase.

Who am I? It's a question that echoes in my mind as I navigate through this maze of existence, feeling perpetually stuck. Every word I say, every action I take, seems to miss the mark, leaving me in a state of restless dissatisfaction. It's as if I'm searching for something just beyond my reach, an elusive truth that continues to evade me despite my relentless efforts. This isn't about embellishment or poetic musings; it's a straightforward admission of the frustration and confusion that define my current state.

I’m a people pleaser first and foremost. But I’ve also come to realize that I’ve been suppressing apart of myself that I no longer wish to suppress. It's a part of me, woven into the fabric of my being, impossible to hide or ignore. Despite my efforts to suppress it, I now realize that I need it, that it is a fundamental part of who I am. I long for someone to help me navigate this uncharted territory, to shed light on this desire and guide me through accepting it. I yearn for understanding, for someone to see me, truly see me, and help me embrace this aspect of myself without fear or shame.

Who am I looking for?

In this longing, there's a sense of yearning for a connection that transcends the ordinary, a desire for someone who not only understands but also cherishes the depth of my being. This imagined partner embodies qualities that speak to my soul—his intelligence, his passion, his unwavering commitment. His demeanor, initially guarded, hints at layers waiting to be explored, revealing a man of substance and depth.

His presence is like a beacon of hope, illuminating the possibility of a love that is both profound and transformative. I envision moments of shared laughter and whispered conversations, of adventures embarked upon together, and quiet moments of understanding. His dominance is not about control but about a confident assurance that ignites a spark within me, urging me to embrace my desires fully.

He represents a blend of strength and vulnerability, of tradition and modernity. He challenges me to break free from the constraints of the ordinary and reach for something extraordinary. In his gaze, I see the reflection of my own longing, mirrored back to me with a promise of fulfillment. He embodies the hope that somewhere out there, my desires will find their match, and the wait will have been worth it.

What do I want?

I yearn to surrender myself completely to someone, to be consumed by a romance overflowing with both love and lust, teetering on the edge of obsession. The desire is so profound that it consumes my thoughts incessantly, lingering even when I should be focused on other matters. I ache for a connection where I can be unapologetically myself, vulnerable yet safe, lost in a whirlwind of passion and devotion that blurs the boundaries between love and desire.

Still have questions? Please don’t hesitate to reach out. Xx